RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

For Issues, Ideas, or Subjects That Do Not Fit Elsewhere
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Darradarljod
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by Darradarljod »

Hi team,

I'm a bit further along in my play of Boris Vyachceslav now than when I first asked for some feedback.

If you have any constructive criticism or compliments on my playing of the Khazark's pitbull, I would very much appreciate the feedback and guidance of our community toward shaping this character into an authentic construction of a Thayan Knight-Commander.

Thanks in advance.

D
JCVD1
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by JCVD1 »

He needs more muscles, sorry.
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Darradarljod
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by Darradarljod »

JCVD1 wrote:He needs more muscles, sorry.
I knew it...
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TheLier
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by TheLier »

Darradarljod wrote:
JCVD1 wrote:He needs more muscles, sorry.
I knew it...
And a good plastic surgeon!
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Darradarljod
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by Darradarljod »

TheLier wrote:
Darradarljod wrote:
JCVD1 wrote:He needs more muscles, sorry.
I knew it...
And a good plastic surgeon!
Funny you should mention that!
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Legofsalmon
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by Legofsalmon »

Tsidkenu wrote:That is a really helpful critique Arakes. I'm sure Darkcloud has a lot to gain from those words.

Has anyone the courage to offer something of similar rhetorical brilliance about my current main, Aeili? Let me first outline what I have tried to convey in terms of Aeili's character, perceptions and outlook:

- Aeili is a sun elf from a noble background but has abandoned most of her haughty heritage. Some vesitiges of it remain, such as using eloquent and elevated language and possessing a hatred for orcs (less so their half-spawn kin). She is suspicious of outsider-blood but has had two close outsider friends in the past (Valerius, tiefling, and Karen, air-genasai).

- Aeili was trained in a female-only magic college on Evermeet (Sisters of the Sun) at the behest of her father who is an enchanter, while also undergoing training for Sehanine's priesthood under the tutelage of her mother. She has a love for arcane and divine magic, as well as astrology.

- Aeili had only the one romantic encounter while on Evermeet which left her heartbroken. She has been very reserved in this area ever since.

- She received a vision from Mystra beckoning her to come to Faerun. She fought with her mother over the meaning of this vision since Sehanine beseeches elves to migrate from Faerun to Evermeet. This remains an unresolved conflict. Aeili left her homeland amidst the turmoil of King Zaor Moonflower's assassination by passing through a portal connecting with the Elven community of Evereska.

- I have not fully developed what happened between Aeili's arrival in Evereska and her passage to finally arrive in Baldur's Gate. A portion of this untold story involves her surname Azenci which is clearly not Elven.

- Neither have I developed the full meaning of her arcane tattoos across her forehead. Her cheek (upper cheek, just below the eyes) tattoos I RP as having been given in childhood as a sign of her committment to Corellon, Elven god of magic, and Sehanine Moonbow.

- Aeili's character was shaped early by exposure to the now-defunct Weavemasters guild, for whom she became the chaplain. This was some 5 years ago!

- Aeili left for Waterdeep and spend 3.5 years there (indicative of player hiatus from this server for that time). She returned to BG with a resentment for Red Wizards after the Mystran temple in Waterdeep and its leader, Meleghost Starseer, starting becoming chummy with the Red Wizard enclave.

- Aeili's alignment is Lawful Good, but of late I have been leaning heavily towards Lawful Neutral. Has that been noticeable?

- Her knowledge extends to the following and I attempt to RP such:

Profession: Astrologer (indicated by ranks in Sense Motive)
Knowledge: Local (Leuthilspar, Taltempla, Evereska, Waterdeep, Baldur's Gate)
Knowledge: Regional (Evermeet)
Knowledge: History (esp. Elvish and magic, including ancient languages of Netherese and Loross)
Knowledge: Alchemy
Knowledge: Arcana (esp. the schools of divination and enchantment)
Knowledge: Religion (Elven pantheon; Magic Deities esp. Mystra, Savras, Deneir, Azuth; slowly growing knowledge of Human religion esp. Ilmater, Helm, Sune, Tymora and Waukeen. She has some knowledge of Shar, Bane and Bhaal simply by association with the Temple of Mystra).
Knowledge: The Planes (especially Celesial, Infernal and Abyssal abodes)
Knowledge: Nature (insofar as it pertains to Elven cultural exposure)
Spellcraft.

Outside of these I have attempted at having little to no knowledge and would appreciate feedback in these areas. I am really trying hard at not playing a know-it-all, despite Aeili being both an arcane diviner and a cleric with the knowledge domain.

I would really appreciate some feedback about my progress and ways I can improve!
First and foremost as a player/user of the forum and server I'm going to praise you on your clear communication and use of grammar in all of your posts; whenever I see a message on the forums you've posted I immediately know it's going to be clear, readable and pragmatic. This comes across in your roleplay.

Although we haven't really interacted on too many seperate occasions, your roleplay of Aeili felt heavily commited and inspired a considerable IC shift in my character Hoppy's direction. Your representation of Aeili as somewhat stoic but kind hearted and patient really hit the mark and shapes their interaction together, It has inspired several more 'lawful' ways of thinking.

It's clear you've put a lot of time and effort into her and this kind of dedicated roleplay is what inspires the same in others (myself inclued). This positive does in fact leads me to my suggestion for improving.

You mention in your post about being conscious of being a know-it-all and reading that now does make more sense. I find that as a player you have a lot of knowledge and lore as well ICly where you are playing a diviner and knowledge cleric. My only real critique (and I could be misjudging as we've not played too often) is not to be so afraid of that, it's okay to come across as a bit preachy now and then, or talk 'at' people, you seem like a considerate player and all i'm saying is perhaps worry a bit less about that, I find it unlikely you'd be the kind of egoist "I KNOW ALL THE DND/FR THINGS/My character is so all knowing!" that people dislike to rp with.

tldr; Overall Aeili feels like an individual with a lot to say but doesn't always say it, this adds to her mystery and overall allure so definitely utilise that, but if I were you I would worry less about coming across know-it-all or talking -at- people, you're allowed, you've earned it and seem considerate enough as a player to not offend people. Take care and see you in game! PS: your avatar is great, did you make it yourself?

Hoppy Toadmeadow what are your thoughts guys? Love, hate? I've enjoyed playing her, the character being as overty friendly and talkative, as well as quirky and animated I feel gives me the freedom to hyper inject roleplay and life, I feel like this hopefully allows me to include other people by acting as an extrovert, providing enjoyable background noise or to act like social glue.

I hope she provides small amounts of comic relief but not mood-breakingly so. It's become an interesting thought experiment roleplaying her, someone innocent/naive in a D&D hacknslash fantasy setting. I just hope she isn't too goody-goody so as to be cookie cutter, I'm aware conflict and intrigue are more enjoyable in the long term than everyone getting along and co-operating. I don't want to fall into the trap of being an anime character, I would like to flesh her out more. I feel the response I've gotten is positive and i'm actually relieved when people are far more jaded/suspicious or patronising towards her. I am aware I'm playing a very hyperbole-esque character and certainly hope others don't feel like they have rp down to disney levels to accomodate.
Hoppy Toadmeadow Very active
Elvaene De'lindessa Semi-active
Nina Tidytoes (Plar) Inactive
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Tsidkenu
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by Tsidkenu »

Wow, talk about a flash back to the past!

Thanks for the encouraging words, Salmon.

As for Hoppy, she is many things that a lot of halflings tend to be. Energetic, enthusiastic and generally likeable. Sociable characters tend to get along well on the server given the IC penchant to RP, although there are some brilliant nihilist loners (I'm looking at you, Snarfy!) that are also roleplayed really well.

Both growth and intrigue are useful components of all good RP. Static characters that cannot change or be changed by the world around them lack depth, and mystery is what brings you back a second, third and forth time, etc. You want to know what lays beneath the surface, and sometimes that takes effort and time to prise out (looking at you, Grimcheese!).

Let your character grow and be moulded by the RP interactions, good and ill, and you'll have a great time here.
dak12attack
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Location: Massachusetts

Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by dak12attack »

Critique Arbjorn or Gideon pls
Characters:
Vertiline Mockett, tech-smith and one-hand wonderbringer & Cogsworth, the trusty and rusty battle-bot butler.

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TheLier
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by TheLier »

Been playing Saerthal for a while now, what do you think about him, guys?
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TaskForce58
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by TaskForce58 »

Legofsalmon wrote:I hope she provides small amounts of comic relief but not mood-breakingly so. It's become an interesting thought experiment roleplaying her, someone innocent/naive in a D&D hacknslash fantasy setting. I just hope she isn't too goody-goody so as to be cookie cutter, I'm aware conflict and intrigue are more enjoyable in the long term than everyone getting along and co-operating. I don't want to fall into the trap of being an anime character, I would like to flesh her out more. I feel the response I've gotten is positive and i'm actually relieved when people are far more jaded/suspicious or patronising towards her. I am aware I'm playing a very hyperbole-esque character and certainly hope others don't feel like they have rp down to disney levels to accomodate.

For Mariko, Hoppy provides an energetic, sometimes comical outlet for her OTHER emotions, those that dont involve duty, honor, serious-cut-down-anything-that-is-hostile to her. Secretly i sometimes dread running into you with her because: "There goes the rest of my evening's chance to go kill something" lol. Just kidding, as we end up running into some awesome character development RP and improv moments, which tend to attract (entrap?) others. The very presence of Hoppy also provides Mariko a link to her Sword Coast past, since only she and terri are actually even active as characters anymore. Hoppy also gives Mariko a great access to more localised customs, language, and...yes...FOOD!

AS a character, Hoppy to me is truly a kind natured soul, if naive, yet capable of access to incredible power (spells,etc). Despite her nearly constant cheeriness, she still rides an emotional rollercoaster and it is readily apparent when things are not entirely well, as she seems to be almost manic depressive when harried or concerned for the safety of her friends...which is pretty much everyone.

Hoppy is the irresistable lure to an evening of conversational diversion, and a wonderful focus for the mother/fatherly type characters.
"You don't have to outrun your enemies, you just have to trip the dwarf"-Uthar the Black http://bgtscc.net/viewtopic.php?f=20&t=44051

"Karma is...karma"- Mariko Akechii http://bgtscc.net/viewtopic.php?f=20&t=44052
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WhatsInTheBox
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by WhatsInTheBox »

So major necromancy of a super old post by someone but....



Nuno2008 said:
.... im not one to go against what DM say but i hope you noticed you used a fantasy character from a fantasy world one that hasnt the foggiest idea of the depth of true martial arts. Conan would be owned very quickly by some real life masters. I can tell because he is all muscle so his moovements are sluggish and slow his stance is laughable and his technique is non existance. How you can place him within the paramenters of " weapon master " eludes me... What i said was to keep realism to those that wanted it then again everyone is free to voice their own ops..

______________________________________________________________________________

I saw the above posted and HAD to defend my dude Conan. A real life martial artist wouldn't even be able to damage Conan because Conan's strength is so far beyond realism not even 4 of the dudes that compete in the strong men competitions IRL could out do him. He punches buffalos in the forehead and cracks their skulls. He is a master with every weapon he picks up and? He is legendarily fast despite what the above person thought. Conan is just a barbarian warrior's wet dream. Incredibly tough,strong and fast beyond measure with perfect mastery of his gear and a never say die rage to back it all up. Don't take the movies as reference to Conan. Read the books and comics.
Plays: Valmaxian Darcassan - One seriously screwed up looking elf
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TaskForce58
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Location: Wheeling, WV, USA, Terra, SOL, Milky Way, Virgo Cluster

Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by TaskForce58 »

Conan is a flesh colored Incredible Hulk with a sword...that being said...a full force kick or punch to the larynx and he's gonna have trouble breathing...everywhere else will probably just piss him off.
"You don't have to outrun your enemies, you just have to trip the dwarf"-Uthar the Black http://bgtscc.net/viewtopic.php?f=20&t=44051

"Karma is...karma"- Mariko Akechii http://bgtscc.net/viewtopic.php?f=20&t=44052
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Cowbot
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by Cowbot »

Hello, I just wanted to sign up for this club. My in game player name is also Cowbot.

My main solo character is Betha Begbie.

I also play Hijo with my friends sometimes. Of course others are welcome to play with us (and they have.)

Before I vanish into obscurity again, I just wanted to say that I found it amusing that on page 1 of this thread people were arguing about WM. Then, on page 39 of this thread, people are still arguing about WM.

That is all.
Malanthyus
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by Malanthyus »

*sneaksneak, Pokes head in *

Um. Hiya. I tend to be fairly bad at these, and may not fully understand the thread...that said.

User name "Malanthyus", main in game character "Sadra Stumblestongue"

The character is kind of obviously a work in progress. Also sort of looking at advice on progression. The idea is to make a scholar that's interested in archaeology and prior civilizations for the sake of their stories, not so much trying to dig up magical artifacts.

The basic backstory is that he was originally just a random peasant or traveler of the sword coast who was kidnapped and tortured by an ancient lich associated with the Shoon dynasty to be used as a long term spy, though more it would be more accurate to call him a living recording device. Although he was altered and tortured by magic, his current state isn't really magical in nature, or a curse, it's that the trauma of having his mind and brain cut apart then healed ultimately altered the fundamental ways his brain worked.

I guess I was wondering what people thought of him, or had advice for how I RP'd him?

Thanks in advance. ^_^;
Sandra Stumbletongue ~ Arcane spellcaster, amnesiac and would be archaeologist

"Not important? How amazing! How truly remarkable! I've NEVER met anyone who wasn't.~ The Doctor
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ValerieJean
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Re: RP-Critique/Support/Self Monitoring Club

Unread post by ValerieJean »

Hiyas, I have played here for some time now I guess and would like to be apart of it. Helping others may also in turn help me.

My Account name is ValerieJean and I play

Donamira - Surface
Gaven Arkalis -Surface
Micar'vilchi Illiathor - Surface
Mia - Surface
Radrilla Helvi'viir(Nediira Hunt'lar) - UD
Radrilla Imrae Helvi'viir
Gaven Arkalis
Micar'vilchi Illiathor - Dhaerowathi (Drow Bane)
Mia
Donamira
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