Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

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Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

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Well people, hope you are gonna enjoy ^^ and as a little top on the cake, Kelian new theme [youtube]https://www.youtube.com/embed/Czam1dKjoCc[/youtube]
*After buying a new journal, a more normal and dusty one, empty, Kelian went back to his room, his head filled with the memories of the past*

You are our friend Kelian, we will always be there for you

lies

You really have a warm heart - do not worry, we have time

lies

I believe you Kelian - *giggles* i love you

LIES!

*without realizing, lost in those thoughts, his right hand goes once again to his chest, the scar left from that acidic burn still aching, making his pain more physical.Finally realizes of his surroundings, taking deep breaths and looking at the door of his room. Opens it with a shaking hand, having some difficulties inserting the key in the hole.Once inside, goes to the bed and takes out his quill*

"10 Alturiak, 1357

..i have fallen for it again. I trusted their words. Not blindly this time..i was careful...i tried to open up slowly to not let them hurt me again. I failed.I tried to let them see. I tried to tell them of the threat of the undead...the lich that is coming back...they did not listen. They believed only in half truth and rumors...they did not even give me the chance to talk.They judged me without even seeing what i am doing or listening

Fine, they want to keep fighting undead for the rest of their lives because of petty squabbles and meaningless hate? suit themselves. I am done sacrificing my-"

*realizes what he is writing and his mind goes back to the other evening with Elle, takes a deep breath while his free hand goes to his chest again*

"..they have left me with so much anger inside...the pain got worst...i will not fall, yet.Even if they are hypocrites, there are still some lives worth saving in that town. There are still childrens and innocents that did nothing wrong. I will not abandon them to the storm that is coming.

Yet this anger is...so strong,so unquencheable..."

*takes a deeper breath then, trying to calm down like the wandering medic thought him*

"..i will turn it against the cultists. I will personally give them the hunt one by one untill i find his philactery and destroy it under my foot.Even if i am alone, even if i have to carve my path in dhaerows blood by myself bare handed, even if i have to face the whole underdark without anyone but my Lord at my side, untill this light will burn everything on my path!"

*realizes once more what he wrote down and closes his eyes murmuring in desperation*..elle...help...*then gulps down another bit of air*

"...yesterday i tried to die...the pain was..too much, too strong...both Shaz and Elle came to me. They...helped me, each one in their own way. I do not trust the-" *realizes once again what is writing and shakes his head* "i will try to trust them...they soothed a bit the pain, in their own way. Who reminded me of what i was teaching her, the other how i helped her when she could see only darkness...they made me realize this is a fight i cannot win without others. But i am done reaching, asking to fight with me. I WILL fight. i am not the monster they depicted me as. I WILL find Polvich's philactery and put an end on his long work done on this coast once and for all.If they want to join my battle, so be it, but i am done trus-"*closes his eyes once more taking another deep breath*

"...i need peace...i need to find Ly'loren...i did not expect this. I expected the corruption he talked about would have come from the cultists, from the Dhaerows...i was prepared to fight off that...did not expect the ones i wanted to protect to put me through this...i need to know whatelse this prophecy says...

Firstly, i have to talk with Edelgarde and Shael. They have to know that,this time, we fight by my rules.Who knows...maybe, once this story will be over, i will manage to find a place for myself like Elle said..."
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

"11 Alturiak 1357

Yesterday i changed my attire...i was tired of being recognized wherever i'd go. I doned an armor bought at Beregost and a black cape. Then i made my way to the cloudpeaks, i needed to exercise myself against the undead...i made my way through the giants but got careless in the cave of the lich. I forgot to turn them and ended up being dispelled and paralyzed...would have been the end for me if Iolanna did not rescue me

This anger tells me to not trust her...but she has been kind with me and is a follower of Eldath...unless her too is a fake kind of peace.Anyway, i still owed her, so i told her of all my discoveries on the lich's cult. She was..impressed? i think, is hard to read expressions on druids for how much they are always composed. She called over the Archdruid and i shared my knowledge...i was wary, tense. I really cannot control all this rage and untrust...even with those that i learned to know

I shared with them another thing, a divine intuition sended to me by Lathander, he showed me images of Triel and of something that was gonna happen that night. I shared it with the druids, but were not really kin to follow messages like that...cannot blame them, these messages are always so vague. That's why i did not wish to reach for Levi that time...and if i did not knew that i cannot win this war alone, i am not sure i would have gone to Edelgarde and Shael later.So i went to Candlekeep again, in search for them, and i found the elf...i told her of the intuition and Eisen reached me..a bit surprised i must say but...i do still have a lingering trust in him. He has been fair with me so far, logic and understood that if i was really so corrupted or vile, Lathander would have stripped me of any power by now.

He had a good point thought, i stumbled in that dhaerow so many times and most of them without even realizing i was going there. I let him check if i was under Geis or compulsory magic...he found nothing. Probably should have gone to the councilor three days ago but...so much happened...and this rage telling me to trust noone..."

*clenches a bit his fist trying then to relax*

"after that...he said would have tried to talk with the radiants and the halls, he is sure to put a good word...but i do not want to go there. Even if is true, even if is not just a trap, even if i did not had all this rage...i feel too broken...i need time...i will just hurt them all like this.Or at least..is what i thought.

Shael called some help, few people that was sure i could trust: Tirion ,althought he joined us at Triel, and Natariel, two elves of that village in the north that i heard of from Thalanis, Sirion, althought i think he was there by chance?, and Eisenhorn apprentice, Mouse, not sure why she wishes to be called like that... i asked Edelgarde to tag along too, she knows much on these problems as well. Of course, many were...sceptic, at best, miss Natariel barely spoke to me but in the end was..alright? the trip was good..a bit funny...althought is always hard for me to understand the elves sometimes but...they still opened up a bit, they answered questions from me and Edelgarde, i learned much again thanks to them.

So...in the end, something did happen. There was a sudden double attack from spiders at the North east and bugbears at the south...i was far more worried for the second, because an hamlet of humans was nearby and in need of urgent aid since they were on the path of the horde.While everyone was still thinking i just spitted out my ideas, like everytime i do, told everyone to make a sending: the Halls to Sirion, the Radiants to Shael and asked Natariel and Tirion if they could call someone in aid...i was..surprised. Everyone listened to me...was..was just a coincidence?

Anyway, even without that, the Hellriders made a call to arms, so probably they would have come even without me saying to make a call. Once an army assembled i was relieved..but..i could not look neither to those of the Halls or those of the Radiants..i have seen even Jassin there but...whenever i tried to look them in the eyes i could feel nothing but judgement and belittlement. I felt so frustrated and angry...i hoped they would have not recognized me from under the hood so i just stayed quiet, let Tirion organize them. It was fine, i did not care to lead them, only to be able and see why my Lord guided me there...but...once again i got surprised. I believed that him would have guided our group towards the spiders, while the Halls and the Radiants took care of the hamlet south...but then Tirion suddenly said "follow me to fight the Horde!" leaving everyone buffled...

*finally cracks a smile while writing*

"i will remember Sirion cry for the rest of my life i believe..he screamed to his running back "You were supposed to guide us north, you arse!!" i cannot avoid finding it amusing i swear.Well..everyone was buffled and without a clue on what to do...and i did it again...i just started walking and said to follow me...i did not even looked back but i could hear so many footsteps. I tried to explain them my plan, but, of course, miss Boots was not in agreement with it. She just wanted to kill every spiderwitch lover in the place. Normally i would have agreed, but the attacks from the undead are increasing and even dhaerows attivities are too rampant...they sped up their plans, and this means is not good. I was so frustrated...i just stopped talking, unleashed my anger on the spiders. They were stronger, bigger..but always the same kind. Now i am pretty sure of it, they are breeding them and experimenting on them...but again, they left false proofs of Lolithes on the site...the situation south looked dire and the threat of the spider was vanquished, so i told to whoever wished to join the effort on defend the hamlet to go south, that a small group to survey the area was enough. I was left alone with Sirion Mouse and miss Boots, tried to find some trace...but she kept just avoiding me or helping me finding clues it was...so frustrating that i leashed out in anger...

Like i said, i cannot go to them is...too dangerous, i could say something stupid...she was not really angered but, of course, got even colder. I was about to give up, really, when the others came back from the south, when even Boots made a comment on how all of that was too weird...too out of character for the spiderwitch lovers...for that single moment, she sparked up my hope, an hope that she finally looked over the hate and the hurtful past...sparkle that the others stomp on quickly ,saying that nothing was abnormal and just be done with it...i am so tired...i said nothing..

We went back to the camp. Nobody spoke with me but i expected that. To be honest, i expected more to being dragged away in chains or accused of whatever-halftruth-they-believed-in-this-time...Shael reassured me that was all my paranoia...maybe she is right..yet, this does not addup ..there was no sign of the cultists,except the usual ones that the others don't see, nothing relevant like the last time i had a vision...so, what was that all about? i am not under compulsion or geis...cannot have been something sended by the Dhaerows...why sending me there?

Maybe the priests of the Song of the Morning can help me in uncovering something more behind that revelation...i will try to reach for them soon...and..even if is a bad idea, probably should try to talk with miss Boots. She looked cold but...not angered..and i need to know why she believed that something did not add up...she also said that had a report for me, if she did not just...burn it away or something.Should also take back my elven armor and helmet...no point in disguising now, seems that no matter what i do, or what they say, i cannot stop being myself...and..probably is better like this. I will not give them the satisfaction to turn me in the monster they believe i am"

*takes a little deep breath looking at his trembling hand, then clenching it at fist* maybe some meditation will help me calm down...
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*after going back in his room, he just flops on the bed, tired and a bit empty. Taking out his journal would start to write*

12 Alturiak 1357

"I really can't believe what i heard...well, let's go in order

firstly, i met a bit of persons outside the Gate in the morning...i was not too keen to linger there but i had to meet miss boots. I found isabella. She told me that they seems to discuss what to do with me. I prefered not to ask more questions, just remembering that makes me shake in rage. Probably i should not go back to Baldur's gate afterall...anyway,Nalissa joined in and she was..very kind, gave me a hug but...i just used all my will to not just push her away...i know she was just trying to be nice.. Reiker joined in after a bit, everyone reassured me..or at least tried...that they are just mad..that time will give me right if i stay consistent. Well that is another big if since what kind of consistency there is if they being kept feed with lies and half truths?

Elle came later...she was a bit off but said that was fine. The conversation started really to annoy me so i just decided to go and clear the fields from the undead, keep myself in shape and the road safe, and asked her to join since i know she is still training..i am glad that she accepted, i don't know how she do it but i feel calm near her...more my old self.Still, i should have noticed that was not in shape to fight..she caught a cold. I told her that i could easily heal it, but wanted it to go naturally..not waste divine power on just that.Still, she was so reckless that wanted to stay out and near the campfire, while she was barely able to breath correctly...had to take her by hand and guide her to the inn in town where she was staying, and speaking of that..ugh..well in order.

I bringed the human at her inn, put her near the heartfire and took a bit care like i used to do with many. She was a bit trembling so i did my best to help her warm up, fear she was starting to get a fever.I tried to distract her a bit, trying to make a simple chat to focus on but...ended up to tell me a part of her past that is trying to bury deep in herself...and that is not good..is something i have learned quite well. After that she fell asleep, exhausted..but was tormented by nightmares. I singed for her. I think was the second time that i singed for someone else...the first time was for my old companions.."

*the memory of the five laughing around the campfire in the farmlands strikes him back, making him grit his teeth in rage* lies...

*then trying to contain himself shakes his head and goes back to write*

"I asked at the innkeeper and bringed her up on her room, put her into bed, and left...i did not want to stay in that town a minute longer. Afterall Tarina saw us...dear gods i can already imagine the lies spreading again...i walked south and ended up meeting with the Archdruid. He told me what kind of half truths are being spread among house Darius and the Halls.So it seems that i have been seen "singing" to her and "holding her hand while going somewhere private"....what the **** ?...first, i never singed. I played my lute to relax myself, or at least trying, while questioning her. Secondly, i holded her hand because she was continuosly bumping and falling down blinded by the light..putting aside that In the trollclaws doing something like that is consorting death, for the love of god what the heavens does that mean? i keep the hands of childrens and old people as well to help them walk or guiding them home...and thirdly, somewhere private? we were in the middle of nowhere on a hill!...again, either this individual that Lylan'Synor trust is a complete idiot or is trying to ruin my reputations for some reasons...probably the second since, and this is the weirdest part, between me "singing" and "holding her hand" there was an attack on us...a rised skeleton that caught both of us offguard...why omitting that.."

*sighs and massages his eyes, tired, for a moment tries to contain himself again.After a deep breath and holding his chest in pain once more, begins to write again*

"..i will ask someone of the few persons that i still trust a bit to check on this story, something does not add up.After that talk with the Archdruid i was utterly infuriated...thanks Lathander master Bhor contacted me and with Eisenhorn we went and fought off some giants and the Balor near the greypeaks...but i was still not satisfied, so with Al i went to the cloudpeaks, to fight again...we were reached from master Ironsong too.After we cleared pretty much the whole mountain, i was finally tired enough to just stop by at Candlekeep and rest...Edelgarde left me some interesting notes from the rumors of that tanar'ri spotted on the battlefield at Triel.I will have to investigate that as well in the next days...after resting for a bit, not much happened.I helped some travelers, people that reminded me of how we were two months ago...healed the elf of the group and rised from the dead a man...Turok, i think one of the four called him...they probably wanted to thank me but honestly? i was too tired, too angry...i just turned my back after being sure they were fine and moved on.

I do not think much more happ-oh right...i did met miss Boots, while traveling south with Al, passing through the farmlands again. She said was too busy to talk...i want to believe was true...gods this feeling of not being able to trust any of them...and i met Sirion again with a good part of the Emerald Enclave. I am happy i did, they made me smile quite a lot...i need that in these days.Still, was not enough...and here i am, back in my room and exhaust with only my Journal to vent on...not even the music is helping anymore, i do not really feel like playing or singing anymore...with Elle was...a nice exception, i guess..i wanted her to rest peacefully and well...and that is what happened.Who knows, maybe one day i will be able to sing again...for now, better focus on this hunt"
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*Now at Candlekeep, waiting once more for Edelgarde to discuss, Kelian takes out his new journal and put it on the desk, writing on it*

13 Alturiak 1357

"Yesterday was eventful again. I met a certain miss,mrs?, Mackharty and was quite the kind person...with a bit of a situation similar to mine...we spended the whole morning togheter, she said to me to not trust the Radiants and the Halls, but i wish to believe that she is just that lost in hate like everyone else.So i took a bit of courage, using this ire to walk through their judging eyes...i heard the rumors of sister Ashenie standing for hours in front of the shrine of Eldath and wanted to be sure that she was alright.I...snapped at her...even standing on the ground of the Halls fills me with so much wrath...for all the memories builded there...all the lies they said..

*takes a deep breath trying to calm down once more, but this time is less hard for him to contain his fury, then goes back to write*

she tried to ease my anger, my pain...still, the scout of the Radiant passed by, checking on me i presume, and saw us while she was holding my hand. I swear, if they start to slender her i am gonna turn in their worst nightmare! i am gonna take her far away from that town, she does not deserve such cruelty.She guided me to the north reach woods...i told her that should not go there, is dangerous and not only because Aunrae is not one that should be trusted...but because from what i know the cultists are still attacking that place from time to time. Overheard the druid at the Halls saying that...odd..he reminded me of the one that was with Iolanna...hm..

Anyway, once there, she said that spoke with her again there...that was inspired by her words, despite not being able to say if she is trustworthy or not...but despite that, she has a point. I let Lily Lylan'Synor poison me with her false believes on Lathander: i have to foster new hopes for a better future for all, not only for "selected few".Even if it is dangerous or it will bring me to death, this world need that kind of faith...the coast needs it, is something that Robin said with his words. Ah, right, i forgot the most important part...i learned that the man that, originally, leaded me to Adrian, was all along Robin Goodfellow that i was thinking to reach out...odd..Adrian told me that many seeked for him but in vain, he came to me thought two times.Well..i enjoyed his company thought, despite we had to change location. He was considerate enough to only hint with his words that we were going to be reached by others...was not really surprised. I have seen Levi running and pass by...probably as a scout for the Halls and the Radiants...seriously, if they just wanted to know, they could have asked..."

*sighs quite deeply and shakes his head*

"He teleported us to a dark place,a tomb..not sure where it was, could not recognize anything familiar..he said was a tomb of a lich long dead and gone, destroyed by some paladins.I would have liked to hear the tale, but i had to focus on the task. I made some questions and he leaded me to another clue...probably...it is a bit hard to understand the fey. Is not, thought, the lead he left with his words to made me glad to have let Ashenie bring me to that place...were the words that he said after. That gossips and rumors are the blight of the coast and that i should not let them stop me...he called me leading light. I..am not so sure that is correct, on the leading part, but sure as heavens i will try. After he left and took us back to Eldath shrine, he told us to enjoy the beauty of the place a bit longer...we even exchanged a promise: if i die because of this story, he would write a book about me, otherwise i will have to write one on this whole story...so now i really have to write a book in the future"

*chuckles a little at the thought shaking his head*

"After that, i asked Ashenie how come she have so much faith in me...others still have, but they did not stay with me long enough...at some point, even in their eyes i will do something that they will not approve and push me away...but after all this time? she didn't. She answered that admired me, at least i think, because i am like a phoenix. No matter how hard i have been beaten, i always stand up to fight again...and that a great future awaits me.I keep believing that is the most pure and kind soul i have ever met in this world so far in forty years...ah,right, soon will be forty one...i do not even check the calendar anymore.Well, anyway, i asked her to bring me back to the Halls...with her at my side i wanted to face my sisters and try to make her listen..at least this time had a true witnesses on what happened...but she had her duties to the orphanage and...i did lose courage. I realized that if they do not trust me enough to have to spy on me like that, then what chances can i have to be listened staying alone..? i have left then as well, asking Ashenie for her company today again...she is right, there is strength in unity...but this rage..will make me do something stupid, i know, but..i will still cling a bit on it togheter with my faith. I feel less scared, i feel less insecure...and when i think on how many enemies await on my path, fighting me with dirty tricks and poisoned blades, i feel only...determination."

*smiles a bit putting down the quill* a phoenix...who knows..if i survive, if i manage to carve a place for myself like Elle hope for me...i could use it as my Symbol..
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*observing from the top of the mountain the view of the world below, silently contemplate the dark night with a pondering gaze, after a little bit decide to take up his journal once more to write in it*

14 Alturiak 1357

"The world from up here seems so peaceful...so silent. This is helping me meditating and focusing in containing this ire..especially since in this cold, no human elf or other kind of hypoc individual will easily reach me and disturb my praying. Yesterday was...awkward in many ways.In the morning, i went to the greypeaks to try and fight the fire giants and the balor on my own..i have met a wizard, Damian, he told me that another group went up...master Bhor was guiding them but had no clue who were the other two. We reached almost half of the mountain when i decided to make a sending to my friend...uh...i wonder if he still is my friend...he told me that Levitari and Sean were with him, up to me if feeling to reach them. Still don't know why i believed was a good idea doing so. Show them that i am not the monster they believe i am? not willing to let myself lay down and hide for them? i cannot say. I used a spell to protect us two from harm and rushed to them...did i want to see her maybe?..well, not much of a point, since after a skirmish with the giants she left right away.She used a very poor excuse and just barely answered me. What else did i expect exactly?

After fighting the fire giant king, even the knight left us.He said was busy and i want to believe him but...hard to feel something different from judgement and belittlement right now..but is a knight, i want to believe that he stated the truth just like miss Boots.The fight with the Balor this time was a hard one. I was not focused enough, i got careless...maybe everyone is right, this anger is not really helping me as i thought. On a good note, i do not fear Yogolovich or howelseiswritten. I managed to turn and paralyze even the balor, so my training gave good results despite all that is costing me this war...if i managed to think carefully on the move to do, maybe i would have realized sooner.

After that i went back to baldur's gate, needed to clear my inventory and seek for Nalissa...i need some of her potions to cover what i am lacking.Was able to find her but she was a moment busy with her stocks.. I have seen Levtari and Lylan'Synor as well. I avoided them. I simply am too mad at them to even approach. Made a sending to Nalissa and just walked my way. She was worried when reached me, feared that i had lost too much faith in this world and that i will lose myself in rage...i..can't blame her. Sometimes again, this anger is so deep that i can't barely contain it myself. Like what happened later...i had an idea on how to fix things, thanks to Robin suggestion...what i discovered? that Shael had that idea before me and said nothing. I was infuriated inside...i felt once again left out, abandoned...but i did my best to contain it; i asked Edelgarde to call to her, i wanted to hear her version, i wanted to know why she did not tell me...she said that was an idea that came up the day before and was still organizing. It required me an effort, but i believed her and apologized for jumping to conclusion..i did so because THAT is what someone does when hear something he does not like."

*looks at what he wrote and sighs deeply* i sound so furious...*take another deep breath of that freezing air, unable to really feel that cold, leaving him only indifferent while looking at the night getting darker for few moments and then goes back to write*

"I talked long with Edelgarde...she as well is pissed at the Halls...but i am trying to not trust them too much. People of Candlekeep and Spades i mean. Not really because of what others said, but because i am tired of having my trust being betrayed. I am just working with them and doing idle chats. Nothing more. We went outside after that, at Baldur's Gate...i have met Ashenie again, but she was busy, and there was this funny and friendly hin gathering donations for the church. I donated twice. Hope that will help them a little bit. There were the usual people as well, i think i have saw even some of the Radiants, but did not care. Like i said i will not let them change me.I will make past this long night...i will reach for that dawn that i still hope into, when everything else crumbled and is gone...a dawn when Polvich will be gone once and for all...but for that i need to calm down. This ire will not help with what is coming....i have to make it subside a bit more"

*the light begins to shine over the mountain, the snow slowly shining and everything became to be brighter and more beautiful at the light of the sun.Observe that scene, pondering a bit more while finding that inner calm then writes*

"the messanger of the underdark came to me again. She told me that they are upset for the "betrayal" of the Halls and that she is avoiding them now, fearing for her life. I do not trust her and i know what she aims for with those words. Still, she did good in avoiding them. They like it or not, she is changing in better ways and, even more, i need the informations to understand how big is the threat..the only thing that worries me is what she asked in exchange for her help...

*gets a bit embarassed but then sighs*

...she wants a child from me.Not..even sure that is physically possible giving the nature of both of us...she said that does not care...would have like to try all the times that are needed to achieve it...i really do not understand what she is aiming for...especially now, she should know that is..hard for me to have such an intimacy with someone.I asked time. Said that i would have thinked about it. She looked happy and that worries me in many ways...and that is the thing: she worries me, does not inspire a desire for love...but the last one could be because of what happened with the people of the Halls. Is the first time i feel confused and at a loss since Lil Lylan'Synor filled me with this anger...but is better if i focus now on meditating...i feel restless again and it is no good"

*closes the journal and put the quill away* and it is no good..*begins then to pray softly to Lathander with his singing*
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*feeling the seabreeze on his face, stares into the night looking down on the village few moments, the humans hins and every other creature fall asleep in the warmth of their house...taking a deep tired breath from the nose takes out the quill and the journal*

15 Alturiak 1357

"It was too soon. I knew it was too soon, yet i listened to Edelgarde and Isabella...i met Lily and Levi ye-

..i cannot really stop to call them like that, don't i? *murmurs saddened to himself and takes another deep breath*

yesterday that were unleashing their ire on Isabella near baldur's gate. They said that was her fault that i was isolating and pushing myself away from the Halls...they do not realize how much deep did they hurt me with their own words. I was not able to shut up and walk, i leashed out at them.We snarled at eachother in rage and i shutted a door in front of them...they were so mad...after that Isabella tried to convince me again to not stay alone and join them. I did not listen to her either. I do not trust her and despite what is happening, despite what they believe, i am still following their advices...both of the Councilor and the others at the Halls.Still the anger clouded my eyes...i just was seeing what i wanted to see and heared what i wanted to hear from them.Ashenie, Edelgarde,Elle...everyone telling me to forget them, to move on or simply reminding me of their mistakes as well.

Here is the thing thought:people makes mistakes. Is so simple of a lesson that i nearly forgot. Levi tried to tell me that but i was too blinded by ire that i could not see it.I thought that anger, that rage, could help me fight the lich and its army...and how it ended up? that he won. Lily is right, i am isolated...and so i got ambushed on the road from Nashkel to Beregost...the lich and its dhaerow allies got fed up with my digging and trying to drag them to the light.If was not for Edelgarde, Rayvat but especially for Ashenie, i would have died for sure this time..there were also other travelers attracted by the battle...ther horde was endless.The enemy is getting stronger, is getting more allies,is becoming more vicious as well. I am tired to fight a war on so many fronts...sure, the enclave, spades and some members of Candlekeep stands with me but...the coast cannot stand divided against this threat. Is the same reason why all the attempts so far failed and i believe is the reason why Polvich is trying so hard to get rid of me."

*takes a look at the elven sword, the one offered to the councilor and that she left to him* How much blood did i already covered you in...how much shall i spill before to get done with this promise...*then goes back into writing*

"I still wonder..why did Lathander put me on this path? despite what everyone says, i am not strong...not strong enough for this...yet, they believe in me and i feel compelled to pay back in kind the faith that i am given.I told them to stop giving right to my anger, today i said to Elle to talk with them, hear their version of the story and see for herself. That is the right thing to do...yesterday i tried again to talk with Levi.She is mad..and i understand that, if the horde did not quench the rage, probably i would have been mad too...but at least was wise and put aside our issue to fight the enemy at Triel.I can just cling to the hope that this is a seed for mending.

for now...i will just try to rest.Without the support of the Halls, of my sisters, i am feeling exhausted again from the continous battles and research...this place that Florina showed me is beautiful and not completely isolated..i wonder where she is.I will observe the dawning sun from here and..hope that the Morninglord will grant me this wish: He made me stumble in so many pieces of the puzzle..the fey, the dhaerow, the vision...i will just pray that will make me stumble in a more peaceful sister of mine...no matter who she is, no matter if will belittle or judge me just...have a chance to speak in peace, with no anger or no interlopers..."

*close then the journal and rises his head to look at the night sky one more time, lost in thoughts.*
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*sitted at the edge of the hall, looking at the inn, Kelian loses himself in thoughts for few moments, reminding of that night of tendays ago when he met Jassin and the Councilor*

You are destined to fail

*closes his eyes and takes a little deep breath, taking then his quill and his journal*

"16 Alturiak 1357

..i have been used.Abused.Controlled...both from my anger and those that i met so far.Yesterday...Lathander answered my prayers...Lily came to me.She talked much...she said many true things, i realized them without that anger clouding my judgement. None of them was something i wanted...none of them were something i seeked...but still, are things that happened.I barely tried to defend my faith...and that showed..a side of her that i did not know.I broke...i begged for the first time in my life to a mortal...i just did not wish to see another person i loved suffer hell because of me. I was so broke, that i was ready to throw away everything i ever stood up for...i was ready to abandon all the people that still look up to me...love is..a scary thing.I was ready for that and yet...she did not believe me...

Later the same day, i tried to calm down the spirits...i met Edelgarde and Isabella at the firecamp, they just had a fight with Lily and Adrian from what everyone told me...i thought they started it, but those presents told me that...it was actually the opposite. The Halls were the one that started it and the two candlekeepers did only defend themselves...why?..what went so wrong that hate is..so strong in everyone?..i heard a motto from a Baldurian, some days ago, based on that stupid law..."tollerance is treason"...what the heavens? is that really why everyone is so on edge? is that why there can be no comprehension..?..i tried to spoke of peace and comprehension at the firecamp...tried to make them understand that if the cultists are so rampant, that if the darkness is spreading..is because the coast stays divided. They listened. Many agreed

..so why...everyone says that the other part is liying.True,i said so too, out of anger, out of pain and out of the feeling of betrayl but..i do not hate the Halls nor the people that they accuse to do so seems to...i kept my calm..Isabella was surprised, because she told me that i went from moment of great woe to moments of great hope...i did not lie, but i did hide part of the answer. I have only moments of woe in these days...because no matter what i do, conflicts are the only thing in my sight. It is endless.I do not really dream of a world without it...i just want the people in my view to be happy, at ease. My vision expanded after i saved one. Ten after one. Fifty after Ten , hundred after fifty.I have lost counts after hundred...and what i began to realize?..that this ideal i believe in..seems so impossible..

So many still take my hand, push me by the shoulders, drag me down from the feet or tries to pull me back...many of them just try to push me in the direction they want...looking up to me like some kind of supreme hope...is not like i don't care. Is the opposite, i care for all of them...but i never felt the need of appreciation, nor had any intention of becoming some "champion" some hero....i just wanted a result where everyone would be happy...but to save one? i trample over others...dozens...and when i try to reach and save those i trampled...i end up to ignoring even more people. I killed many creatures on my path to save and rescue those in front of me...and destroyed all their hopes in doing so. Kept telling myself, keeping repeating myself, this time will go well...this time everyone will be happy...still, i end up every-single-time making those dear to me suffer.I am driven by this obsessive impulse to save those in reach, i keep moving, trying to ignore the pain in and around me, nor how wrong it is for those around me. What is this if not hypocrisy?"

*then closes his eyes a moment, his mind trying to recall memories of happines in all his life but finding it empty...untill that morning, opening them slowly*

"..you are really trying to be the hero of everyone,hm?"

*takes another deep breath, more relaxed, more at peace when the same night with the elves comes into his mind again*

it seems you are playing a game of your own

You are destined to fail

"..yes..the councilor is right. I am destined to fail...because i am trying to please everyone, while listening to all of them...they look at me, like something they can either have for themselves or can aspire to.Yet, my very being is made of light...and despite what they believe, noone can control it.They can call me as they wish, Champion or Traitor. I have my faith. I have brothers and sisters in this faith.I have people believing in these words of possibility and peace, one where this fear and desperation will be driven away from these lands.Those that will like to follow me, to listen to me...will always be welcomed.The others...included my loved ones...will have my seeds of hope and peace, letting them decide if making them growth or wither...but i am sorry, Lily, i know that you are just worried for me..but Tollerance is not treason. Tollerance brings to comprehension, comprehension to understanding,understanding to peace. Tollerance is hope.

The training of Elle today have seen a young paladin of Lathander, Jyn, joining us...it was like look in an old mirror...she sparkled again in me that faith that i got lost among all this hate,all this pain that surrounds me...like always, Lathander makes me stumble in what leads my path...and i shall follow.

Forgive me, Lily..Councilor...Alarielle...i know that for you there can be no peace with them...i know that those that dwell in the dark are treacherous and cannot be trusted...but i will not break my principles, my duties to my Lord.I will keep fighting for that dawn in front of me...and i will not let others drive me or suggest anymore.I don't know how yet...but i will undone this cycle of untrust and hate, of prejudice and suffering.I will fight for this world on my own if i have to."

*then taking another deep breath closes the journal and his eyes* Yet...is time that i seek my kin in faith...is possible that a crusade will have to be called soon...
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*closed in his room at the inn, he takes out his usual journal to start writing*

18 Alturiak 1357

"Has been such two busy days that i did not even had time to write in this journal...so where to start. I keep training Elle and Jyn whenever i have time, helping them grow give me a sense of fullfilment in this moment...and they are helping me back in getting on my feet. My paranoia recede and i managed to contact some people again and talk without thinking they are going to betray me, like Nathan or miss Boots...i still do not understand why she wishes to be called with this nickname but, oh well. Still is unnerving how people talks so lightly of distrusting others...i mean, in these two days i went to Baldur's gate...for a walk like, few hours? and i heard three people, in three different houses or factions, to how not trust people of the other ones...and they were all baldurian's! gods what's wrong in this world...

Well, i had enough. I will not allow young adventurers and hopes to become like them...from this story i forged a new principle: I am on noone side, i am tired of their political games, their swamp of hatred and distrust, the gossips that hide the truth and so forth. If they want to play these sicks games, is on their souls not mine....yet, i will not abandon them. I will find a way to break down this descending spiral. It will require time and a lot of work, but i will find a way to do so while protecting them, while protecting this world...and for that, i am on everyone side, even if they would not acknowledge it. I never did it to be praised in the first place anyway. Some people gathered around me, new faces, new possibilities...they liked my idea and are keeping their ears open...with Jyn and Elle help i am defining the guidelines and code, descerning the objectives...Salim began to build some prototypes..Edelgarde guaranteed for him, and he seems to have absolute faith in me...i am not that sure if i should be glad or scared of this, but his idea is good,it can work. All of this can work.No matter what it takes, i will make a brighter day"

*his mind goes back to memories of those days, to the words of Aiden*
"that is a road full of pain you are walking into"
*makes then a soft smile* yeah...i know...*then in trying to find some more strength, a faint memory comes fort*
you...have..warm heart
hm..i wonder who said that...

"i found mysel with some memory loss after the storm of rage passed. I don't know, maybe a sort of defence from my mind to protect me?..it erased...many things it happened in the days past. I barely remember the days of joy in the Halls and...i do not remember what happened before that.I remember their names, their faces and why now i should not trust them...but before the night at frost keep? void.Weird...anyway, i am finding myself less hesitating..and of course, again, working non stop. I should also begin to prepare the ritual for communion now that i think on it...there are few questions that requires the light of my Lord. Sadly that Edelgarde did not believe in faith too much, she is good in making questions...i will try to ask for suggestions to her later again maybe."
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*sitted on a bench near the Song of the Morning his gaze goes towards the dark horizon once more, a bit of time left before his Lord would rise in the sky..the hands goes to the Journal once more and putting it on his lap, takes the magical quill to start writing*

"19 Alturiak 1357

Here i thought was far enough from Baldur's Gate to not be reached by their problems. I thought that i could finally find some peace and let others deal with this whole mess for a little while longer...but i was wrong. Lathander guided my path once more towards this accursed story...going in order, i took a stroll yesterday with Eisen and Tommy around the land,after having trained and talked with Elle and Jyn. I need founds for this project and so it means that i cannot retire from the wandering, even if i have a place now.The stroll was a good one, Eisen helped me out as well giving me some items that he could not sell...both him and Salim are helping me prepare for war, not like i wanted to, but they have a point...even if all i wish for is peace, nothing wrong with being prepared for the worst.

I walked then with Tommy towards Baldur's Gate, Eisen had other things to do, and there i have met Isabella and Tarina. Both seems to had a horrible night last time..i offered to help. They were not interested. I did not insist...i am tired of stretching out my hand to those that do not wish to, if they have a problem and wish to speak, they will find me...and then, the mess began once more. Back to Beregost, i was approached from a Templar of the Song. He was interested in my story, we spoke long and Jyn reached for us too...the Light of Lathander guided us all inside the temple. It was a sign, the communion had to be helded...and i uncovered a new part of the truth.Now, i just wonder who will listen to it..."

*making a little sigh observe the horizon once more for few moments, his mind trying once more to recall happy memories but in vain, except for the cheeky face of Elle. It makes him do a little smile*

"I wonder if she will be around here again today.I understand she has her duties now, just like i have mine, and that she will be even busier in the days to come...still...cannot help but worry for her. I know that i am not alone, that i have people to count on and new lights to guide to a better future...yet..she is the only one that i am still capable to worry for like this..."

*the memories of the past days, the feeling of betrayal and pain rushing to his mind again, making him curl his lips in pain for a moment.Takes then a little deep breath and writes down again*

"..i know i should not give all this power to one person over me.Still, the more i try to keep my distance from her, the more she extends her hand...the more she does it, the more i am tempted to hold it and never let go..i should not.I will hurt her too."

*sighs once more, noticing the night going darker, the stars disappearing and the silence reigning over the town*

"I have to prepare the wards for the interrogation and trying to help that elf..Aryndill?..must be sure that she does not suffer of post traumatic experience. I will do my best to avoid such a thing to others.After that...like always, i will let the Lord of Creativity guide my steps, see where He will lead me."

*closes his journal and looks at the horizon, observing the first light of the morning break the sky and enlighten everything a little bit, making him smile and softly hum..but his tune is more melanchonic, more distant while observe the rising sun*
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*once again he enters the Phoenix with a tired expression, the days was barely at half and already had enough. Stretching out before sitting in the usual corner of the hall, looks a the journal in his bag and decide to take it out togheter with the quill*

"20 Alturiak 1357

So..where to start...yesterday started quite well. Actually, i was..really happy..Elle arrived after a bit. Noone else just me and her...we talked long...she told me of her fears, of her darkness...and i managed to make it a bit of a brighter day for her..i was really happy to see her so bright and smiling.She confessed that she stayed with me, at the start, because was sure i would have protect her...i do not mind. Everyone does that, i am fine with it..but few are so honest with me, it gave me hope that...maybe this time will be di-"

*his hand freeze, his mind goes blank for a moment while his brain tilts at the memory of the last time he wrote something like that, last time he trusted someone like that*

...what was i writing again? *a bit confused then just shakes his head*

"..sometimes i find myself with this strange..void of memory...like few hours ago, i was talking with this Gilthanas and sister Ashenie..they were speaking of magic and how each culture live it differently...i felt sad all of a sudden.I...had already that conversation with someone? in a tavern..we were laughing?..do not really remember.Anyway, after that, i went towards the cloudpeaks to fight the giants alone once again but...Lathander guided me to mister Morgan, a wizard met that morning, and Tommy. We fought togheter the threats of the mountain and we found out that the giants and the lizardfolk were quite active...i am surprised of that,were they organizing against Nashkel? Regardless of what they were doing, we all managed to get some magical item that the giants were holding. We met also miss Milli in the keep and with her we went to the Vault to fight the Dracolich. Morrigan left us at Baldur's Gate but we still managed to destroy the abomination in three.Was fun traveling with them...i laughed so much while it lasted.

Then, the circle of hell began anew..quite litteraly.I found myself to talk with Ashenie and in a blink of an eye, we were surrounded by people...i invited some of them to help me investigating an attack that my informant reported to me.Boots said to Nigel to accompany me...i thought to myself "alright, maybe they do things done once in a while instead of just judging" and was quite glad...was quite the wide group, even Ashenie came along...why does she follow me...she would not fight, she has her vows she is...so frail..why she is the only one who fight with me without asking...she should be one of those i am supposed protect."

*sighs a bit tired, rising his head once more to observe the hall of the tavern for a moment but then just shakes his head and goes back to write*

"We went down Hilltop...we explored for long and we found little at first.Some got tired and were not patient enough. They are never patient enough. The first to disappear without a word, and left me quite disappointed, was Nigel.Then Bhor, but at least he said that had to leave for important business that came up, and finally Orneaille as well went away with...very few words, like always.Our fighting power was reduced greatly and while we were preparing to depart, the fiends of Orcus striked. Empowered bladelings,hellhounds undead...balors...at least thirty of them i counted before i was just...lost in the massacre i was more swinging my weapon then just thinking...Morgan helped greatly, at first he did not even believed we were under attack,. at some point i managed to take a moment of-

*the writing suddenly stops here as a new figure approaches*

------------------------------------

*several hours later, sitting on the bench outside the church, with that smile still wide on his face remember her words closing his eyes*

..it's easy to love the pleasant and unscandalous.You gave the hardest type of love there is. And that is a comfort and hope that i wish to see in all people

*the smile becomes actually warmer and decide to open his journal to keep writing again*

"of...i do not really remember what i was going to write. I do not really care anymore i think?..i want to work a bit on that song, now."
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*left alone once again after training some new explorers and adventurers, Kelian found his hand on the journal and quill once more, observing the country fields with a more serene expression*

"22 Alturiak 1357

So...has been a couple of days that i do not write in here, has been both busy and happy days. A very surprise in these dark ones of constant conflict that i always live.The 21 i had really a pleasant day...making my way from baldur's gate to Beregost many tagged along with me like usual,but i found this orc of the underdark, a druid, that came along too.Followed Arendyl and Mackarty to the shrine of Mielikki. We all spoke long, sharing common knowledge from each world and informations about what is going on wrong with the Coast,up and down it. We got joined by a paladin of Tyr, Lux...she did not judge, did not complain and actually spoke with the Orc without prejudice. It was a day full of hope....and of course, when the light shines the brightes, the dark comes forth. The spiders attacked again, there was also a cultist.Thanks to Mackarty,Ashenie,Sel,Tommy and an elf called Gilthanas we pushed them back and stopped the drow...but it slipped through my fingers. Again."

*sighs in frustration for a moment at the thought but then shrugs, not even angered and just writing*

"This blade is so much soaked in blood now...i can't pray hard enough for this night to come to an end soon.Yet..another bright moment happened after that. Tired, i stumbled at the Phoenix Inn.I was writing in my journal when that young elf joined my table in silence...i rised my gaze a moment and she was there, in front of me at my table, reading. Was funny. She feeled homesick, she was so sad...i took out the last bottle of Moonwine i had with me. It was...for someone? i was waiting to come back?...not sure anymore.That brighted her day...it was a good talk and i was feeling attachment growing..but..i did not want to go through all of "that" again...i did not want to grow attached to one of them that can only feel hate for others. So, i told her the whole story of what happened and why i am far away from the Gate and their rumors and hate...she praised my action.Said that i did good in going against what others told me to help someone lost in the dark.

It felt good"

*the smile on his face warming up again but then shakes his head*

"That gave me enough strength to reach baldur's gate again, i had some items to sell and to find a printer for the flyers for the Flame.I was informed of the f---kery of Nigel. Honestly? is incredible how for the first time in my life i am beginning to dislike someone...i never disliked even my enemies, because i know that they still deserve respect..but someone that abandon the group without a word? leaving non combatant to fight an horde of the abyss? trying to break into the temple of Lathander? now, congratulations to him,is the first in my life that i will do my best to not even say "hi" to.What worries me is that i am ending up making pay it to the Radiants as whole...and that is not good.I then walked to the temple of Ilmater..i was seeking council both for me and for Avery situations...i spoke long with sister Ashenie and i have seen her without her hood for the first time in my life. I could not really help but say of how has such a beautiful mane, really, so much i was surprised"

*chuckles a bit shaking his head and writing down again*

"After that i heard of this party at the Siren's Song...for newcomers and factions around, to let eachother known. Wanted to try and promote the Flame but...Avery stumbled on my way, like many do in this troubled coast...she was angered and broken..she pushed me away at first and,so, i knew that Lathander guided me to her..she needed help, so i forfaited that party to help her calm down.We went to the fields and saved the lives of three elves and...met a "friendly" undead.Was immune to anything i had.I do not want to talk about that.After it, me and Elle talked a lot..she was smiling and happier, so i say was worth it.

Now, yesterday, was another eventful day...my informants told me of both what happened underground and at Baldur's gate. I think the two events are correlated...i have a plan to investigate it but i already knew that noone would have listened or liked it at the meeting, so i kept it for myself. I wanted to understand who to trust first. The meeting went surprisingly well, far better than i expected.There was a moment where this knight of the..Everwatch something..offered his service to go and guard Beregost. I was buffled...first, had nothing to do with the purpouse of the meeting, second, should propose that to the knights of the Song, not the houses of Baldur's Gate. I tried to make him reasoning but either he has a hard skull or was trying to just trick me...i want to believe the first.In the end, i just told him that i would have forwarded his message and will to sir Edwood and let them sort it out. I was there to rapresent the Song on the matter of Pol, not to play political games.Still find it rude, thought."

*rises a moment his gaze to ponder on what else happened and his gaze saddens up a bit*

"Adrian was...in dire conditions. Iolanna helped him out but her power was not enough to make him feel better. Despite fearing another hateful gaze, i stood up and tended to him. Was the right thing to do.Few plans were already proposed, but i still think is too soon to convey a final solution to the problem. We just started, and thankfully with little arguing and infighting, despite hearing the usual "far too numeros" whispers of distrust and hate.What really tired me out was what happened after. Iolanna approached me worried, seems that this sick rumors of me running behind drowess is spreading underground too and they are surely planning to use it against me somehow."

*massages a bit his eyes*..should i just start killing any that approach now, like all those faithless do..? *mumbles a bit tired again and sighs.After few minutes shakes his head*

"I will not let paranoia take control of me again i will do what i always did so far: giving an open hand while holding a blade in the other. If they want peace, i will give peace, if they want to trick me i shall give them war.After the meeting i was approached by the commander of the Silver Rose order. She praised my words and efforts...i soon told her everything, about the rumors, the lies, the happenings in the trollclaws.If she wants to become like everyone else at the Gate, better be so soon. I am tired of fighting on multiple fronts, but i do not have time either to decide if she is trustworthy or not...up to her."

*ponders looking at the page almost over in space* Hmm..i wrote quite a lot. Better stop here for today.
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*Left alone sit on the bench near the church of Lathander, Kelian open his journal once more on his lap and takes the quill out*

"23 Alturiak 1357

So..once again, yesterday was a day full of events...let's start from the morning i guess. I was patroling the road towards baldur's gate, the Way of the Lion is called if i remember correctly.I met Jyn training and clearing the road from gnolls, i helped her out for a bit and gave her some news.After that i kept patroling and met a knight,another woman...i wonder why i stumble in many female creatures of this world?..anyway..she was an interesting one, judging by actions and motives, more than by rules and orders. I invited her to stay at Beregost, hope to see her again...and finally, after few hours again, i met Arendyll. She was fidgeting nervously right on the middle of the road to Candlekeep...must admit she was really cute, like looking at a rabbit staring into the unknown."

*chuckles softly at the memory*

"We spoke a little and she reflected on the possibility of joining Candlekeep...i was a bit sad since i hoped for her to join the Flame as a researcher at least..but then i thought that was better like this.She is too sweet..if she hangs around me, she will surely suffer. So i took her gently by hand and guided her to Isabella, let her sort things out and them talk.We met her and Jalib right outside and i stood there, just observing and being a support in case would have been refused.She was not and happily went inside the gates...i am glad for her. So, i decided that had done enough work of patroling and went to do some work for the Flame. The flyers are ready but still money are needed for these things...so i was invited from this traveler, Graendel, to clear the cloudpeaks again. After defeating that white dragon i felt more reassured and we fought the giant king us alone. Now that the rage is gone, the confidence and assurance remained, we managed to clear the mountains without much issue...but then again, duty called me back.

sir Edwood required an update on the meeting and the events of Polvich, i provided as much as i could being crystal as always. He did not judge, surprisingly..i wondered for how much will last when one of my informant contacted me.Was a good occasion to put both to test and see how honest they are...was...refreshing. Both of them were normal...none was paranoid about the other or stroke in fear..maybe i can trust in sir Edwood honesty, but was not only for that meeting that i believe this. Pretty much at the start of that meeting, was contacted by Iolanna too and asked to reach her for talking about a cure to the balor hellfire wounds. Once again i was surprised pleasantly, noone fought, noone argued...we shared ideas and developed few plans under the watchful eye of sir Edwood and of Eldath..i felt at easy like did not happen since a long time.

We were attacked by gnolls, they summoned a Balor...and once again i was struck by Ashenie pure soul. She spoke with them, both the Balor and the gnolls. She managed to convince the gnolls to leave us be and the Balor to not attack us...i..found myself in the shoes of Lily and Alyssia. I told her again how dangerous is speaking with creature of the lower planes..i told her again that should not do such a thing and..i felt a bit ignored despite my worries for them because of how much i care. So..now i understand their points and i do not get it: i do not feel mad nor ignored, i know that Ashenie and Iolanna are just who they are....so why they did felt betrayed? why the Halls hurted me with those words that night? was really just because Isabella was there? their hatred for her is that deep to ignore any word i say?

I have no answer and their silence does not help...i can do only one logical thing with all these threats to fight and places to investigate...move on. Ah right, that Nigel tried to pick a fight with me at the shrine of Eldath. I argued back a couple of times, but in respect to the place i just flat ignored him and asked to my companions to move back on the road again.Sir Edwood left to reach for the Song again, was reached by Shaz while i was talking with my informant.She did not give up on me with her lust, for some reason again, but at least now i have "one" person that believe that those rumors are just fake rumors...why she suddenly wanted to undress in the middle of the road still leave me buffled"

*sighs a bit and shakes his head*

"There is something terribly wrong, someone is twisting both mine and her story...this is far over the point where most of the mortals of this world reason with their lower half instead with their brain, these are complete twist notions of true things.I don't know who, or why, is doing this...but i think that they are seeing opportunities in these costant attacks, in the tiredness and exhaustion that everyone is experiencing...and is nothing good.Seems that they are pressing to cause a war with the underworld...we decided that will take separate routes to investigate this, not sure mine will yield results since i have lots of things to do, but i will try.While teaching of Lathander at Shaz, we went to Baldur's Gate, i had some things to sell and few things to ask...once again, my Lord guided me to the right place in the right moment...i learned few more things from the paladin Mary of Tyr. These wounds are very likely treatable like hellfire afterall.Will try to reach for Iolanna with this information later."
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*left again alone from his companions, would sit this time at the Risen Phoenix and open his journal once more*

"24 Alturiak 1357

..this time, i really do not know how to start it...was a different long day.So..thanks Lathander, has been... well two days without an ambush of any kind...that's quite the first long period of rest i got and allowed me to make some copies of the new found informations to deliver at Edelgarde.So i just took a stroll in the early morning towards Nashkel, to enjoy a bit of sun and fresh air...i encountered Sel, to whom i explained new more things that i discovered, hoping in his help as well. He did not really give me an answer but at that moment arrived Elle.It was a great start of a day if i can be honest..she is always fun to have around and her presence reassures me...and made me start the day with a wide smile thanks to her michievious acts"

*chuckles at the memory of her confession but then shakes his head and focus a bit more on writing*

"anyway..we started walking towards north, she wanted to reach the friendly arm inn and since i had really nothing to do, i gladly walked with her. I was explaining some news to her as well when we spotted the Archdruid praying at the shrine of Mielikki..i did my best to not disrupt his concentration but Elle...she was so amusing. Looked like a little child when see a new toy, was so nervous, eager and happy that i barely contained a very loud laughter.It was a bliss, seeing them interact so friendly and in peace...i ended up thanking and praying the Queen of the Forests for another blissful day of peace.Then..the situation got awkward, firstly Arendyl arrived and..well he got academical curiosity over the dragondruid, then this human, Jonah, arrived. He was. . . strange. Like he was trying to be more intimately with Elle. I did not like that...still not sure why.The dialogue also started to be a bit too..personal for her, so i tried to help her calm down...that human did not really help but, in the end, i managed to make her laugh a bit...so..half a win? i think.

Then, again i don't know why, but when we all separated for our ways i asked if she needed an escort at the same time as Jonah...again I...am not sure of why i reacted like i was looking at a thieving mouse? i mean, i was not mad at him or anything, just...was really really wary. He said that had things of the Radiant Heart to discuss...so i could really not do much more than grumbling accept that and go to pray at the shrine...when he suddenly said "i did not want to upset your mate" and runned away."

*after that he tries to think back at the scene and the face of Elle at his silence, her concerned look for a moment making him even more embarassed now.Then, memories of syndreth company stroke at him again and the embarassment makes room to fear for few moments, returning then to write a bit more coldly*

"..i will not fall for this trick again. She is just helping me like i am helping her. That's it.Nothing more.I should not grow too attached, she will just get hurt like everyone else and in the end will hurt me.

Trying to forget that event, started patrolling along the road but in the end was not avail. So i contacted Eisenhorn, the Rising Flame need funds after all and had to update him on that too.It seems that Lathander granted me another moment of bliss in this war, he was there with Bhor and a certain Cloak? not sure i spelled it right..she is a blacksmith and a good one at that. Florina also joined our group, she was there where we met, and togheter we went to the cloudpeaks. We were litteraly unstoppable, reached to the Speartop as well to face one of the dragons that reside there. We won without more than few scratches...i..kinda hoped to do it with the Halls once...

After the fight we returned to Baldur's gate, accompanied Eisen to Candlekeep, then walked back just for curiosity. I ended up encountering, both before and after the expedition, this new adventurer..he calls himself Leaf. Wonder why some people takes such aliases....well, anyway, i helped him out to start and learn few things. He is a good fighter and i think can become great one day. I showed him around togheter with Mouse for a bit, teaching him what i could, then needed some deserved rest...at the firecamp there was quite the funny group, made with Sirion, Lark, a couple of strangers and..hm..i remember someone else but at the moment its name escapes me.Weird. Was fun and peaceful but duties called me soon back at Beregost, where i found out that Jyn went alone towards south...i got worried, like always, and ended up to find her without life surrounded by Xvarts, probably fell in an ambush.

Lathander provides and allowed her to come back, i thought she would have been down or felt defeated after that...but surprisingly? she looked like ready for more. Again, i am amazed by her unbending spirit.We talked long, told her how did i end up wandering again and why.Seriously, i will never understand the mortals of this world...she knows me by now and actually said that i remind her of her father, why in the all heavens they think i fell in love with a dhaerow,to use Elle words, remains a freking mistery for me.At this point, why not saying that i fell for the councilor too? i mean, did pretty much the same things! bah.

And speaking of that...the night ended in..probably the worst way possible? Edelgarde contacted me saying,and i quote, "my brother told me that you were looking for me but he is a banana and forgot"...i could not avoid but laugh.Was the last one of the evening sadly. I reached for her at the firecamp and they were in a very heated mood for what the councilor replied to a missive that she sended. I do not understand. I was actually glad of reading what she answered, but everyone was incredibly mad at her...i tried to understand their point but...i mean, alright, they do not get along, but for gods sake, am i the only one who knows her a bit other than Lily and Jassin? i tried to explain to them that actually was a good sign, that there is no need to be so heated and furious...they got almost me as well in that swamp of hatred again.

*sighs a moment shaking his head*

This time thought i kept my ground and did my best to not let that rage fill me in, tried to calm them down...Nathan joined too and togheter with Jalib they added more stress to the conversation, saying that i am naive and expecting too much. I did not get angry, but everyone seemed to think that i was. . . i don't know, probably is because when all you feel around you is rage and hate, you give for granted that others are so too? or i did got infected with it without realizing? i...do not really understand.So, i tried to change approach, took Edelgarde aside and talked only with her..told her to not think of her answer as a "provocative way of retorsion" but as a "she has done a baby step towards helping the coast".

It kinda worked? or at least, she did not say that would have stopped sharing informations with others...i wanted to touch that topic again since i did had informations to share...but that conversation was really tiring and exhausting,i accompanied her back to the firecamp, gave the missives to Jalib and said to Nathan that i was sorry if my words offended him, was not my intention.He was...tired.I already know why, he feels guilty for what happened...i would like to help him but i have really no clue on how to do it anymore...everytime i try, someone gets even more mad or hurt. I will try to pass by him today maybe...now i will write a missive as well. Everyone may think what they want, but she deserve at least a thank you."

*then closes his journal and grab another scroll to write upon..*
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

Hidden: show
since he is not furious and without control, new fitting theme for Kelian ^^ [youtube]https://youtu.be/BDHgAlQgKrs[/youtube]
*sitted on top of the usual balcony, observe the sleepy town down from that viewpoint with a bit of interest and a bit of distance.Decide to take up his journal once more*

"25 Alturiak 1357

Yesterday was a day of almost full relax,rest and laugh.It did not start well, it started with an..argue? fight? with Nathan. I was only trying to help, but he looke uninterested. We started argue, it was...both painful and pointless. No matter what i said, he had to be right. No matter that i repeated the words he used, he kept saying that i misunderstood. At some point, he left. I did not follow....there is that much time i can give to those that do not wish help and the time to heal and recover was almost over...i just enjoyed that day. At the campfire i had a long and peaceful conversation with Florina, Kalina and the Archdruid Emannuel, Rose was there, on her usual branch like always...and singed a song, one that i found myself in...she sang of not carying when others listens to lies, to keep dancing while they cover you with mud and indignity. I made another wide smile..i know she was singing for something happened to her, she said it and i a bit knew it inside...but still, it gave me a bit more of strength

I miss those joyous and peaceful times at the Halls and Doron Amar...but even if they have a change of heart, even if they would accept peace?..i really cannot change myself. I tried. Does not work. Is alright, i will still try to help them and protect this world...but now i understand why many stories i heard around here, of people that dwelled in the light, turned to the darkness.Is not the corruption from those that dwell in the dark something that should be feared...is the love that others give.If you accept it, blindly, without knowing them deeply enough, without understanding them deeply enough..you get hurt.I went to Ashenie after the campfire turned with faces that i did not really wish to see, she asked me to not hold it against them..but i needed to remind her that i still cherish them. I am litteraly incapable of hate at this point"

*smirks a bit and shakes his head*

"After that i went to Candlekeep. I finally organized all the informations gathered in these days, as difficult as it was having to fight myself through it, but i managed. I left specific instructions.After that i went to the inn..Arendel was there, she is..really something. Don't know how she manages to make me smile and laugh so hard with her innocence, but i am happy to have her around when i manage to find time.I would like her to join the Flame but i know that she could lose such innocence with me around..and i don't want that.

I do not think am capable of loving someone anymore either. Shazyilda keep pestering me with her idea of being in love with me, but i donot believe her. She says that she likes me but,even if is true, i simply do not wish it. I am just that hollow now inside on the feeling i guess.I will say no as many times as required, if she still wish to learn and give informations, very well, otherwise suits herself...i rebuilded again. The Flame is a reality now, after two days people began to flock and join my cause...i have enough numbers now to follow these leads, althought cold. Polvich and his allies believes me defeated, without anyone and covered in indignity. Fools. I gathered enough informations.I have new allies and even more informants

Is time to strike back"
Ailander
Posts: 108
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 6:17 am

Re: Kelian Hannen : New Dawn

Unread post by Ailander »

*a bit tired sits on the boot of the inn, observing the empty hall and taking that time to write again in the journal*

"26 Alturiak 1357

Alright...then things are going incredibly smooth.Yesterday i received some confirms.. It seems that is possible to slow down the cult, have only to confirm a couple of things more but this plan will start soon. After that, have to organize the expedition...in the hope to find a break from the costant planning i went to Baldur's Gate..i don't know, i start to believe that i am really a masochist? i tried to talk with guide isabella when squire Orneaille approached just interrupting and doing whatever she pleases. It was so frustrating, hearing her talking about problems and my nature of just not be able to not extend my hand to help in matters,even when someone that repeatedly offended me speaks. I tried despite that to offer my ai-"

*since a masked person approached him, he rises his head and closes the Journal*

*hourse later deep in the night, emitting very frustrated sigh, takes his journal once more*

"i really do not understand.Do some of them hear celestial when i speak? are they just deaf? what? because now i really am too tired and wasting too much time to make others understand. i say "no" to Shaz and how she answer? she asks me to marry her. I say to the groups in the Gate that i wish peace? they keep spitting venom and expecting me to not react. I am done. I have far too many things to organize to waste my time like that, if they are willing to work togheter, good, otherwise i will just ignore them from now on.

Note to self: this time MEAN IT! no matter how exhausted they look, no matter how in pain they seems and no matter how much you wish to help them, stop it! they just hurt you in the end, is pointless and a waste, there are so many that requires your help, focus on them and ignore the others.

All of that written, another one joined the ranks of the Flame.This one is a bit...on the odd side and i have to keep an eye on her...but she is passionate and seems to be more kin to the teachings of Lathander then the others are (also, seriously, why all these females?) and her skills with the bow are unparalleled to many i have seen so far.She is also an expert in fighting threats of the otherworld kind, just needs some better equipment to do so. We can fix that.I had to go to Edelgarde to share and talk about the informations i got, but once again Lathander makes me stumble in a piece of the puzzle and had to obey...have also to speak to Shael for the next meeting, this is an information that the others have to hear...althought i suspect some already know.

Is curious how i have attracted both champions of the light and those used to stalk in the shadows around me for the Flame..i do not believe they are liying, althought they surely have some hidden agenda that did not share yet, still is-"

*the memory of the other day comes to mind, with Arendel sit on the chair enjoying the view*
"You are like a jellyfish!..."
pff..*the tired expression makes room for one more relaxed and a little laugh escapes his lips*

"ah well...if i follow her explanation, yeah,makes sense. I think she was right all along, just like Ashenie,and i should keep moving on keeping her words in mind.Funny, first time thought that i have been called like that...well, there is always a first time i guess.Have to organize this internal meeting and discuss few things. Need the others opinion on how to proceed from now on."
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