Mi-Le: Reflections on the Way ((IC in BG and CK))

[Arn]

The Fourth Truth Of The Middle Path

The fourth truth is that of the Path leading to the realization of the Way. This is known as the Middle Path, because it avoids two extremes: one extreme being the search for happiness through the pleasures of the senses, which is "low, common, unprofitable and the way of the ordinary people"; the other being the search for happiness through self mortification in different forms of asceticism, which is "painful, unworthy and unprofitable".

The Middle Path is not to be confused with the Way itself. Nor should the Middle Path be confused with the Path of Enlightenment, which is a separate religion in Shou Lung.

The Middle Path is composed of eight categories or divisions: namely,

• 1. Right Understanding
  2. Right Thought
  3. Right Speech
  4. Right Action
  5. Right Livelihood
  6. Right Effort
  7. Right Mindfulness
  8. Right Concentration

Practically the whole teaching of my monastery deals in some way or other with this Path. The monks of my monastery explain it in different ways and in different words to different people, according to the stage of their development and their capacity to understand and follow the Path.

It should not be thought that the eight categories or divisions of the Path should be followed and practiced one after the other in the numerical order as given in the usual list above. But they are to be developed more or less simultaneously, as far as possible according to the capacity of each individual. They are all linked together and each helps the cultivation of the others.

These eight factors aim at promoting and perfecting the three essentials of monastic training and discipline: (a) Ethical Conduct, (b) Mental Discipline, and (c) Wisdom. It will therefore be more helpful, for a coherent and better understanding of the eight divisions of the Path, if we group them and explain them according to these three heads.

Ethical Conduct

• In Ethical Conduct are included three factors of the Middle Path: namely, Right Speech, Right Action and Right Livelihood (numbers 3, 4, and 5 in the list).
  
  Right speech means abstention (1) from telling lies, (2) from backbiting and slander and talk that may bring about hatred, enmity, disunity and disharmony among individuals or groups of people, (3) from harsh, rude, impolite, malicious and abusive language, and (4) from idle, useless and foolish babble and gossip. When one abstains from these forms these forms of wrong and harmful speech one naturally has to speak the truth, has to use words that are friendly and benevolent, pleasant and gentle, meaningful and useful. One should not speak carelessly: speech should be at the right time and place. If one cannot say something useful, one should keep "noble silence."
  
  Right Action aims at promoting moral, honorable and peaceful conduct. It admonishes us that we should abstain from destroying life, from stealing, from dishonest dealings, and that we should also help others to lead a peaceful and honorable life in the right way.
  
  Right Livelihood means that one should abstain from making one's living through a profession that brings harm to others, such as trading in arms and lethal weapons, intoxicating drinks, poisons, killing animals, cheating, etc., and should live by a profession which is honorable, blameless, and innocent of harm to others.
  
  These three factors (Right Speech, Right Action and Right Livehood) of the Middle Path constitute Ethical Conduct. No spiritual development is possible without this moral basis.

Mental Discipline

• Mental Discipline includes three other factors of the Middle Path: namely, Right Effort, Right Mindfulness and Right Concentration (numbers 6, 7, and 8 in the list).
  
  Right Effort is the energetic will (1) to prevent evil and unwholesome states of mind from arising, and (2) to get rid of such evil and unwholesome states that have already arisen within a man, and also (3) to produce, to cause to arise, good and wholesome states of mind not yet arisen, and (4) to develop and bring to perfection the good and wholesome states of mind already present in man.
  
  Right Mindfulness is to be diligently aware, mindful and attentive with regard to (1) the activities of the body, (2) sensations or feelings, (3) the activities of the mind, and (4) ideas, thoughts, conception and things. With regard to the body, the practice of concentration on breathing is one of the well-known exercises for mental development. With regard to sensations and feelings, one should be clearly aware of all forms of feelings and sensations, pleasant, unpleasant and neutral, of how they appear and disappear within oneself. Concerning the activities of mind, one should be aware whether one's mind is lustful or not, given to hatred or not, deluded or not, distracted or concentrated, etc. In this way one should be aware of all movements of mind, how they arise and disappear. As regards ideas, thoughts, conceptions, and things, one should know their nature, how they appear and disappear, how they are developed, how they are suppressed, and destroyed, and so on.
  
  Right Concentration leads to the four stages of meditative trance. In the first stage of trance, passionate desires and certain unwholesome thoughts like sensuous lust, ill-will, languor, worry, restlessness, and sceptical doubt are discarded, and feeling of joy and happiness are maintained, along with certain mental activities. In the second stage, all intellectual activities are suppressed, tranquility and "one-pointedness" of mind developed, and the feelings of joy and happiness are still retained. In the third stage, the feeling of joy, which is an active sensation, also disappears, while the disposition of happiness still remains in addition to mindful equanimity. In the fourth stage of trance, all sensations, even of happiness and unhappiness, disappear, only pure equanimity and awareness remaining.
  
  Thus the mind is trained and disciplined and developed through Right Effort, Right Mindfulness, and Right Concentration.

Wisdom

• The remaining two factors, namely Right Thought and Right Understanding, go to constitute Wisdom.
  
  Right Thought denotes the thoughts of selfless renunciation or detachment, thoughts of love and thoughts of non-violence, which are extended to all being. It is very interesting and important to note here that thoughts of selfless detachments, love and non-violence are grouped on the side of wisdom. This clearly shows that true wisdom is endowed with these noble qualities, and that all thoughts of selfish desire, ill-will, hatred and violence are the result of a lack of wisdom - in all spheres of life whether individual, social, or political.
  
  Right Understanding is the understanding of things as they are, and it is the Four Truths that explain things as they really are. Right Understanding therefore is ultimately reduced to the understanding of the Four Truths. This understanding is the highest wisdom which sees the Ultimate Reality. According to my monastery there are two sorts of understanding: What we generally call understanding is knowledge, an accumulated memory, an intellectual grasping of a subject according to certain given data. It is not very deep understanding. Real deep understanding is called "penetration," seeing a thing in its true nature, without name and label. This penetration is possible only when the mind is free from all impurities and is fully developed though meditation.

From this brief account of the Middle Path, one may see that it is a way of life to be followed, practiced, and developed by each individual. It is self-discipline in body, word, and mind, self-development and self-purification. It has nothing to do with belief, prayer, worship, or ceremony. The Middle Path leads to the realization of the Way.

((Adapted from the works of Walpola Rahula))

[Arn]

Pain and Reference

When we feel pain, we feel that way because we are using a certain reference point from the past. We are using a reference point at which we were not experiencing that sensation.

Now, we could use a different reference point. For example, if you perceive an autumn breeze and feel it to be cold, you are using a reference point from the moment before the breeze began. But if you come from the reference point of a freezing winter, you will not feel cold from the autumn breeze.

But even if you use a different reference point, you are still attaching to the past. In following the Way, we do not attach to reference points. Instead, we are mindful and aware of the circumstances as they are at that particular moment, without reacting, judging, or creating complexities in our mind.

There is a moment when our senses make contact with an object or phenomonon, before we react to that object. In that moment, there is only awareness. See how long you can maintain that awareness without reacting, penetrate the conditions of that moment without judging them.

This is mindfulness of the present moment. We observe the processes of our mind and see how thoughts and feelings arise and fade away. It is possible to catch your mind at the moment of awareness, before it reacts and creates something out of that awareness.

And even after your mind has reacted, it is possible to be mindful of that process and penetrate the mind's clinging. Watch the tendency of your mind to cling, observe how it grasps at a thought or emotion, see it without judgment like a third-person observer.

Attachment causes suffering, but the monks of my monastery do not teach us to stamp out attachment or reject attachment. Instead, we are mindful of attachment, we see attachment for what it is, without judging it or ourselves. The more you see attachment for what it is, the less your mind grasps at it.

[Arn]

Five Faultless Gifts

The monks of my monastery teach:

• "There are five great gifts — ancient and long-standing — that are not open to suspicion, will never be open to suspicion, and are unfaulted by the wise.
  
  "There is the case where one abandons the taking of life, abstaining from killing. In doing so, he gives freedom from danger, freedom from animosity, freedom from oppression to limitless numbers of beings. In doing so, he gains a share in limitless freedom from danger, freedom from animosity, and freedom from oppression. This is the first gift, the first great gift.
  
  "In abandoning stealing, one abstains from taking what is not given. In doing so, he gives freedom from danger, freedom from animosity, freedom from oppression to limitless numbers of beings. In doing so, he gains a share in limitless freedom from danger, freedom from animosity, and freedom from oppression. This is the second great gift.
  
  "There is the case where one abandons sexual misconduct. In doing so, he gives freedom from danger, freedom from animosity, freedom from oppression to limitless numbers of beings. In doing so, he gains a share in limitless freedom from danger, freedom from animosity, and freedom from oppression. This is the third great gift.
  
  "In abandoning lying, one abstains from falsehood. In doing so, he gives freedom from danger, freedom from animosity, freedom from oppression to limitless numbers of beings. In doing so, he gains a share in limitless freedom from danger, freedom from animosity, and freedom from oppression. This is the fourth great gift.
  
  "There is the case where one abandons the use of intoxicants. In doing so, he gives freedom from danger, freedom from animosity, freedom from oppression to limitless numbers of beings. In doing so, he gains a share in limitless freedom from danger, freedom from animosity, and freedom from oppression. This is the fifth great gift."

By giving these five gifts, by abstaining from killing, stealing, sexual misconduct, lying, and the use of intoxicants, we save the world from that much more suffering. And by improving the world in this way, we ourselves benefit by creating a better place in which to live.

((Adapted from the Abhisanda Sutta))

[Arn]

Half of the Holy Life

I remember sitting with my master, my sifu, when I was younger and still living at my monastery. As I was sitting there, I said, "This is half of the holy life, sifu: admirable friendship, admirable companionship, and admirable camaraderie."

• "Don't say that, Mi-Le. Don't say that. Admirable friendship, admirable companionship, admirable camaraderie is actually the whole of the holy life. When a monk has admirable people as friends, companions, and comrades, he can be expected to develop and pursue the Middle Path."

So seek out those advanced in virtue. Talk with them, engage them in discussions. Emulate consummate conviction in those who are consummate in conviction, consummate virtue in those who are consummate in virtue, consummate generosity in those who are consummate in generosity, and consummate discernment in those who are consummate in discernment. This is called admirable friendship.

((Adapted from the Upaddha Sutta and the Dighajanu Sutta))

[Arn]

The Way, Here and Now

A difficulty with the Way is that its meaning is beyond the power of words to describe. It is, essentially, undefinable. Another difficulty is that many followers of the Way see the Way as something unobtainable – as so high and so remote that we’re not worthy enough to try for it. Or we see the Way as a goal, as an unknown, undefined something that we should somehow try to attain.

Most of us are conditioned in this way. We want to achieve or attain something that we don’t have now. So the Way is looked at as something that, if you work hard, meditate diligently, become a monastic, devote your life to practice, then your reward might be that eventually you realize the Way - even though we’re not sure what it is.

My sifu would use the words "the reality of non-grasping" as the definition for the Way: realizing the reality of non-grasping. That helps to put it in a context because the emphasis is on awakening to how we grasp and hold on even to words like "the Way" or "the Middle Path" or "practice" or whatever.

It’s often said that the nature of the Way is not to grasp. But that can become just another statement that we grasp and hold on to. It’s a paradox: No matter how hard you try to make sense out of it, you end up in total confusion because of the limitation of language and perception. You have to go beyond language and perception. And the only way to go beyond thinking and emotional habit is through awareness of them, through awareness of thought, through awareness of emotion.

In meditation classes, people often start with a basic delusion that they never challenge: the idea that “I’m someone who grasps and has a lot of desires, and I have to practice in order to get rid of these desires and to stop grasping and clinging to things. I shouldn’t cling to anything.” That’s often the position we start from. So we start our practice from this basis and, many times, the result is disillusionment and disappointment, because our practice is based on the grasping of an idea.

Eventually, we realize that no matter how much we try to get rid of desire and not grasp anything, no matter what we do – become a monk, an ascetic, sit for hours and hours, attend retreats over and over again, do all the things we believe will get rid of these grasping tendencies – we end up feeling disappointed because the basic delusion has never been recognized.

But really, it’s very simple, very direct, and you can’t conceive it. You have to trust it. You have to trust this simple ability that we all have to be fully present and fully awake, and begin to recognize the grasping and the ideas we have taken on about ourselves, about the world around us, about our thoughts and perceptions and feelings. The way of mindfulness is the way of recognizing conditions just as they are. We simply recognize and acknowledge their presence, without blaming them or judging them or criticizing them or praising them. We allow them to be, the positive and the negative both. And, as we trust in this way of mindfulness more and more, we begin to realize the reality of "The Island that you cannot go beyond," the Way.

When I started practicing meditation I felt I was somebody who was very confused and I wanted to get out of this confusion and get rid of my problems and become someone who was not confused, someone who was a clear thinker, someone who would maybe one day become enlightened. That was the impetus that got me going in the direction of meditation. But then, by reflecting on this position that “I am somebody who needs to do something,” I began to see it as a created condition. It was an assumption that I had created. And if I operated from that assumption then I might develop all kinds of skills and live a life that was praiseworthy and good and beneficial to myself and to others but, at the end of the day, I might feel quite disappointed that I did not realize the Way.

Fortunately, the whole direction of monastic life is one where everything is directed at the present. You’re always learning to challenge and to see through your assumptions about yourself. One of the major challenges is the assumption that “I am somebody who needs to do something in order to become enlightened in the future.” Just by recognizing this as an assumption I created, that which is aware knows it is something created out of ignorance, out of not understanding. When we see and recognize this fully, then we stop creating the assumptions.

Awareness is not about making value judgments about our thoughts or emotions or actions or speech. Awareness is about knowing these things fully – that they are what they are, at this moment. So what I found very helpful was learning to be aware of conditions without judging them. In this way, the resultant karma of past actions and speech as it arises in the present is fully recognized without compounding it, without making it into a problem. It is what it is. What arises ceases. As we recognize that and allow things to cease according to their nature, the realization of cessation gives us an increasing amount of faith in the practice of non-attachment and letting go.

The attachments that we have, even to good things like the Way, can also be seen as attachments that blind us. That doesn’t mean we need to get rid of the Way. We merely recognize attachment as attachment and that we create it ourselves out of ignorance. As we keep reflecting on this, the tendency toward attachment falls away, and the reality of non-attachment, of non-grasping, reveals itself in what we can say is the Way. If we look at it in this way, the Way is here and now. It’s not an attainment in the future. The reality is here and now. It is so very simple, but beyond description. It can’t be bestowed or even conveyed, it can only be known by each person for themselves.

As one begins to realize or to recognize non-grasping as the Way, then emotionally one can feel quite frightened by it. It can seem like a kind of annihilation is taking place: all that I think I am in the world, all that I regard as stable and real, starts falling apart and it can be frightening. But if we have the faith to continue bearing with these emotional reactions and allow things that arise to cease, to appear and disappear according to their nature, then we find our stability not in achievement or attaining, but in being – being awake, being aware.

((Adapted from Ajahn Sumedho's introduction to "The Island"))

[Arn]

Doubt

It does not matter what anyone else happens to experience; one meditator will sit here and experience all sorts of brilliant lights, colors, fascinating images, celestial beings, even smell wonderful odors, and hear divine sounds, and think, "What a wonderful meditation, such brilliance came, a divine being came like a radiant angel, touched me and I felt this ecstasy. The most wonderful ecstatic experience of my whole life . . . waited my whole life for this experience."

Meanwhile the next one is thinking, "Why doesn't something like that ever happen to me. I sat for a whole hour in pain with an aching back, depressed, wanting to run away, wondering why on earth I'd come to this retreat anyway."

Another person might say, "I can't stand all those people who have those silly ideas and fantasies, they disgust me, they just develop this terrible hatred and aversion in me. I hate the symbols and imagery on the walls, want to smash it. I hate the Way and meditation!"

Now which of these three people is the good meditator? Compare the one who sees devas dancing in heaven, the one that is bored, indifferent, and dull, or the one full of hatred and aversion. Devas and angels dancing in the celestial realms are impermanent. Boredom is impermanent. Hatred and aversion is impermanent. So the good meditator, the one who is practicing in the right way is looking at the impermanent nature of these conditions.

When you talk to someone who sees devas and experiences bright lights, you start doubting your own practice and think, "But maybe I am not capable of enlightenment. Maybe I am not meditating right." Doubt itself is impermanent. Whatever arises passes away. So the good meditator is the one who sees the impermanent nature of bliss and ecstasy, or experiences dullness, experiences anger, hatred, and aversion, and reflects on the impermanent nature of those qualities, when sitting, walking, or lying down.

What is your tendency? Are you very positive about everything? "I like everybody here. I believe in the teachings of the Way, I believe in the Way." That's a faith kind of mind. It believes, and that kind of mind can create and experience blissful things very quickly. You find that some of the farmers in Kara-Tur, people who have hardly any worldly knowledge, who can hardly read and write, can sometimes experience blissful states, experience lights and see devas and all that, and believe in them. When you believe in devas, you see them. When you believe in lights and celestial realms, you'll see them. What you believe in happens to you. But they are still impermanent, transient, and not self.

Some people don't believe in devas and think such things are silly. This is the negative kind of mind, the one that's suspicious and doubtful, does not believe in anything. "I don't believe in devas. I don't believe in any of that kind of thing. Ridiculous! Show me a deva." So the very suspicious and skeptical mind never sees such things.

There is faith, there is doubt. In practicing the Way, we examine the belief and doubt that we experience in our mind, and we see that these are conditions changing.

((Adapted from the works of Ajahn Sumedho))

[Arn]

Mindfulness Versus Concentration

I have made friends with a priest of Chauntea named Ed. He has had some training as a monk, and a few days ago he told me something I found quite telling about him. Ed said he'd never quite got the hang of meditating until long after his teacher had left him. Then one day, as he was weeding a plot of dirt, he realized he was meditating in his own way. I believe Ed understands mindfulness.

On the other hand, I have met some people in my travels who believe that mindfulness means concentration.

But concentration and mindfulness are distinctly different functions. They each have their role to play in meditation, and the relationship between them is definite and delicate. Concentration is often called one-pointedness of mind. It consists of forcing the mind to remain on one static point. Please note the word FORCE. Concentration is pretty much a forced type of activity. It can be developed by force, by sheer unremitting willpower. And once developed, it retains some of that forced flavor.

Mindfulness, on the other hand, is a delicate function leading to refined sensibilities. These two are partners in the job of meditation. Mindfulness is the sensitive one. He notices things. Concentration provides the power. He keeps the attention pinned down to one item. Ideally, mindfulness is in this relationship. Mindfulness picks the objects of attention, and notices when the attention has gone astray. Concentration does the actual work of holding the attention steady on that chosen object. If either of these partners is weak, your meditation goes astray.

Concentration could be defined as that faculty of the mind which focuses single mindedly on one object without interruption. It must be emphasized that true concentration is a wholesome one-pointedness of mind. That is, the state is free from greed, hatred and delusion. Unwholesome one-pointedness is also possible, but it will not lead to liberation. You can be very single-minded in a state of lust. But that gets you nowhere. Uninterrupted focus on something that you hate does not help you at all. In fact, such unwholesome concentration is fairly short-lived even when it is achieved -- especially when it is used to harm others. True concentration itself is free from such contaminants. It is a state in which the mind is gathered together and thus gains power and intensity. We might use the analogy of a lens. Parallel waves of sunlight falling on a piece of parchment will do no more than warm the surface. But the same amount of light, when focused through a lens, falls on a single point and the parchment bursts into flames. Concentration is the lens. It produces the burning intensity necessary to see into the deeper reaches of the mind. Mindfulness selects the object that the lens will focus on and looks through the lens to see what is there.

Concentration should be regarded as a tool. Like any tool, it can be used for good or for ill. A sharp knife can be used to create a beautiful carving or to harm someone. It is all up to the one who uses the knife. Concentration is similar. Properly used, it can assist you owards liberation. But it can also be used in the service of the ego. It can operate in the framework of achievement and competition. You can use concentration to dominate others. You can use it to be selfish. The real problem is that concentration alone will not give you a perspective on yourself. It won't throw light on the basic problems of selfishness and the nature of suffering. It can be used to dig down into deep psychological states. But even then, the forces of egotism won't be understood. Only mindfulness can do that. If mindfulness is not there to look into the lens and see what has been uncovered, then it is all for nothing. Only mindfulness understands. Only mindfulness brings wisdom.

Concentration has other limitations, too. Really deep concentration can only take place under certain specific conditions. Monks go to a lot of trouble to build meditation halls and monasteries. Their main purpose is to create a physical environment free of distractions in which to learn this skill. No noise, no interruptions. Just as important, however, is the creation of a distraction-free emotional environment. The development of concentration will be blocked by the presence of certain mental states which we call the five hindrances. They are greed for sensual pleasure, hatred, mental lethargy, restlessness, and mental vacillation. A monastery is a controlled environment where this sort of emotional noise is kept to a minimum. Another hurdle for concentration should also be mentioned. In really deep concentration, you get so absorbed in the object of concentration that you forget all about trifles. Like your body, for instance, and your identity and everything around you. Here again the monastery is a useful convenience. It is nice to know that there is somebody to take care of you by watching over all the mundane matters of food and physical security. Without such assurance, one hesitates to go as deeply into concentration as one might.

Mindfulness, on the other hand, is free from all these drawbacks. Mindfulness is not dependent on any such particular circumstance, physical or otherwise. It is a pure noticing factor. Thus it is free to notice whatever comes up -- lust, hatred, or noise. Mindfulness is not limited by any condition. It exists to some extent in every moment, in every circumstance that arises. Also, mindfulness has no fixed object of focus. It observes change. Thus it has an unlimited number of objects of attention. It just looks at whatever is passing through the mind and it does not categorize. Distractions and interruptions are noticed with the same amount of attention as the formal objects of meditation. In a state of pure mindfulness your attention just flows along with whatever changes are taking place in the mind. "Shift, shift, shift. Now this, now this, and now this."

You can't develop mindfulness by force. Active teeth-gritting willpower won't do you any good at all. As a matter of fact, it will hinder progress. Mindfulness cannot be cultivated by struggle. It grows by realizing, by letting go, by just settling down in the moment and letting yourself get comfortable with whatever you are experiencing. This does not mean that mindfulness happens all by itself. Far from it. Energy is required. Effort is required. But this effort is different from force. Mindfulness is cultivated by a gentle effort, by effortless effort. The meditator cultivates mindfulness by constantly reminding himself in a gentle way to maintain his awareness of whatever is happening right now. Persistence and a light touch are the secrets. Mindfulness is cultivated by constantly pulling oneself back to a state of awareness, gently, gently, gently.

Mindfulness can't be used in any selfish way, either. It is nonegoistic alertness. There is no 'me' in a state of pure mindfulness. So there is no self to be selfish. On the contrary, it is mindfulness which gives you the real perspective on yourself. It allows you to take that crucial mental step backward from your own desires and aversions so that you can then look and say, "Ah ha, so that's how I really am."

In a state of mindfulness, you see yourself exactly as you are. You see your own selfish behavior. You see your own suffering. And you see how you create that suffering. You see how you hurt others. You pierce right through the layer of lies that you normally tell yourself and you see what is really there. Mindfulness leads to wisdom.

Mindfulness is not trying to achieve anything. It is just looking. Therefore, desire and aversion are not involved. Competition and struggle for achievement have no place in the process. Mindfulness does not aim at anything. It just sees whatever is already there.

Mindfulness is a broader and larger function than concentration. it is an all-encompassing function. Concentration is exclusive. It settles down on one item and ignores everything else. Mindfulness is inclusive. It stands back from the focus of attention and watches with a broad focus, quick to notice any change that occurs. If you have focused the mind on a stone, concentration will see only the stone. Mindfulness stands back from this process, aware of the stone, aware of the concentration focusing on the stone, aware of the intensity of that focus and instantly aware of the shift of attention when concentration is distracted. It is mindfulness which notices the distraction which has occurred, and it is mindfulness which redirects the attention to the stone.

Mindfulness is more difficult to cultivate than concentration because it is a deeper-reaching function. Concentration is merely focusing of the mind, rather like a laser beam. It has the power to burn its way deep into the mind and illuminate what is there. But it does not understand what it sees. Mindfulness can examine the mechanics of selfishness and understand what it sees. Mindfulness can pierce the mystery of suffering and the mechanism of discomfort. Mindfulness can make you free.

There is, however, another paradox. Mindfulness does not react to what it sees. It just sees and understands. Mindfulness is the essence of patience. Therefore, whatever you see must be simply accepted, acknowledged and dispassionately observed. This is not easy, but it is utterly necessary. We are ignorant. We are selfish and greedy and boastful. We lust and we lie. These are facts. Mindfulness means seeing these facts and being patient with ourselves, accepting ourselves as we are. That goes against the grain. We don't want to accept. We want to deny it. Or change it, or justify it. But acceptance is the essence of mindfulness. If we want to grow in mindfulness we must accept what mindfulness finds. It may be boredom, irritation, or fear. It may be weakness, inadequacy, or faults. Whatever it is, that is the way we are. That is what is real.

Mindfulness simply accepts whatever is there. If you want to grow in mindfulness, patient acceptance is the only route. Mindfulness grows only one way: by continuous practice of mindfulness, by simply trying to be mindful, and that means being patient. The process cannot be forced and it cannot be rushed. It proceeds at its own pace.

The initial stages of mental cultivation are especially delicate. Too much emphasis on mindfulness at this point will actually retard the development of concentration. When getting started in meditation, one of the first things you will notice is how incredibly active the mind really is. This phenomenon is called the "monkey mind." If you emphasize the awareness function at this point, there will be so much to be aware of that concentration will be impossible. Don't get discouraged. This happens to everybody. And there is a simple solution. Put most of your effort into one-pointedness at the beginning. Just keep calling the attention from wandering over and over again. Tough it out. A couple of months down the track and you will have developed concentration power. Then you can start pumping your energy into mindfulness. Do not, however, go so far with concentration that you find yourself going into a stupor.

Mindfulness still is the more important of the two components. It should be built as soon as you comfortably can do so. Mindfulness provides the needed foundation for the subsequent development of deeper concentration. Most blunders in this area of balance will correct themselves in time. Right concentration develops naturally in the wake of strong mindfulness. The more you develop the noticing factor, the quicker you will notice the distraction and the quicker you will pull out of it and return to the formal object of attention. The natural result is increased concentration. And as concentration develops, it assists the development of mindfulness. The more concentration power you have, the less chance there is of launching off on a long chain of analysis about the distraction. You simply note the distraction and return your attention to where it is supposed to be.

Thus the two factors tend to balance and support each other's growth quite naturally. Just about the only rule you need to follow at this point is to put your effort on concentration at the beginning, until the monkey mind phenomenon has cooled down a bit. After that, emphasize mindfulness. If you find yourself getting frantic, emphasize concentration. If you find yourself going into a stupor, emphasize mindfulness. Overall, mindfulness is the one to emphasize.

Mindfulness guides your development in meditation because mindfulness has the ability to be aware of itself. It is mindfulness which will give you a perspective on your practice. Mindfulness will let you know how you are doing. But don't worry too much about that. This is not a race. You are not in competition with anybody, and there is no schedule. One of the most difficult things to learn is that mindfulness is not dependent on any emotional or mental state. We have certain images of meditation. Meditation is something done in quiet caves by tranquil people who move slowly. Those are training conditions. They are set up to foster concentration and to learn the skill of mindfulness. Once you have learned that skill, however, you can dispense with the training restrictions, and you should. You don't need to move at a snail's pace to be mindful. You don't even need to be calm. You can be mindful while solving problems in intensive mathematics. You can be mindful in the middle of a physical training. You can even be mindful in the midst of a raging fury. Mental and physical activities are no bar to mindfulness. If you find your mind extremely active, then simply observe the nature and degree of that activity. It is just a part of the passing show within.

((Adapted from Mindfulness in Plain English, by Venerable Henepola Gunaratana))

[Arn]

The Meaning Of Mindfulness

Mindfulness is an impartial watchfulness. It does not take sides. It does not get hung up in what is perceived. It just perceives. Mindfulness does not get infatuated with the good mental states. It does not try to sidestep the bad mental states. There is no clinging to the pleasant, no fleeing from the unpleasant. Mindfulness sees all experiences as equal, all thoughts as equal, all feelings as equal. Nothing is suppressed. Nothing is repressed. Mindfulness does not play favorites.

Mindfulness is nonconceptual awareness. Another term for this is "bare attention." It is not thinking. It does not get involved with thought or concepts. It does not get hung up on ideas or opinions or memories. It just looks. Mindfulness registers experiences, but it does not compare them. It does not label them or categorize them. It just observes everything as if it was occurring for the first time. It is not analysis which is based on reflection and memory. It is, rather, the direct and immediate experiencing of whatever is happening, without the medium of thought. It comes before thought in the perceptual process.

Mindfulness is present time awareness. It takes place in the here and now. It is the observance of what is happening right now, in the present moment. It stays forever in the present, surging perpetually on the crest of the ongoing wave of passing time. If you are remembering your childhood teacher, that is memory. When you then become aware that you are remembering your childhood teacher, that is mindfulness. If you then conceptualize the process and say to yourself, "Oh, I am remembering," that is thinking.

Mindfulness is non-egoistic alertness. It takes place without reference to self. With Mindfulness one sees all phenomena without references to concepts like "me," "my," or "mine." For example, suppose there is pain in your left leg. Ordinary consciousness would say, "I have a pain." Using Mindfulness, one would simply note the sensation as a sensation. One would not tack on that extra concept "I." Mindfulness stops one from adding anything to perception, or subtracting anything from it. One does not enhance anything. One does not emphasize anything. One just observes exactly what is there -- without distortion.

Mindfulness is goal-less awareness. In Mindfulness, one does not strain for results. One does not try to accomplish anything. When one is mindful, one experiences reality in the present moment in whatever form it takes. There is nothing to be achieved. There is only observation.

Mindfulness is awareness of change. It is observing the passing flow of experience. It is watching things as they are changing. it is seeing the birth, growth, and maturity of all phenomena. It is watching phenomena decay and die. Mindfulness is watching things moment by moment, continuously. It is observing all phenomena -- physical, mental or emotional -- whatever is presently taking place in the mind. One just sits back and watches the show. Mindfulness is the observance of the basic nature of each passing phenomenon. It is watching the thing arising and passing away. It is seeing how that thing makes us feel and how we react to it. It is observing how it affects others. In Mindfulness, one is an unbiased observer whose sole job is to keep track of the constantly passing show of the universe within. Please note that last point. In Mindfulness, one watches the universe within. The meditator who is developing Mindfulness is not concerned with the external universe. It is there, but in meditation, one's field of study is one's own experience, one's thoughts, one's feelings, and one's perceptions. In meditation, one is one's own laboratory. The universe within has an enormous fund of information containing the reflection of the external world and much more. An examination of this material leads to total freedom.

Mindfulness is participatory observation. The meditator is both participant and observer at one and the same time. If one watches one's emotions or physical sensations, one is feeling them at that very same moment. Mindfulness is not an intellectual awareness. It is just here. Mindfulness is objective, but it is not cold or unfeeling. It is the wakeful experience of life, an alert participation in the ongoing process of living.

((Adapted from Mindfulness in Plain English, by Venerable Henepola Gunaratana))

[Arn]

The Trap Of Non-Attachment

Talindra has been kind enough to read my journal. Through her input, I have realized that my journal, if read, may perpetuate a common misunderstanding.

The trap is that we tend to think the Way teaches you to get rid of your desires. That is how some people interpret the Way. But that's wrong: the Way teaches us how to look and understand desire so that we do not grasp it! That's not telling us to get rid of desire but to really understand it so that desire can no longer delude us. The desire to get rid of desire is still desire.

((Adapted from the works of Ajahn Sumedho))

[Arn]

Nothing Is More Joyless Than Selfishness

Earlier today, Sister Reine offered healing to any and all who came to the docks in Baldur's Gate. Talindra, who is to be Reine's student in the healing arts, also lent her aid. It is the kind of initiative that the Sword Coast must see more of.

It is possible for a monk to be a very selfish kind of person, based on the idea: "I must get enlightened and nobody else matters but me." But this is a very joyless and dry way to live. It becomes increasingly dreary operating in this narrow-minded way.

When I was sixteen, my sifu encouraged me to travel and help my friend. I didn’t want to do it, at first. I didn’t want to have to help my friend or be responsible for anything. I had all kinds of romantic ideas of being a monk. Going off to an island, living in a cave in the mountains, developing ki powers, living in a state of bliss for months at a time. I had all kinds of hopes in that direction. Having to think about somebody else was somehow not something I found very attractive. And then, being a monk in Shou Lung they even praised me for being totally selfish: "He’s really a good monk, very strict, doesn’t speak to anyone, likes to be alone, practices hard" – one gets praised for that.

But then life forces us sometimes to look in different directions. That’s obviously what my sifu was doing to me. He was putting the pressure on me, so I began to see and actually realize that if I just kept going the way I was, I would be just a miserable, unhappy, selfish person. I began to think in terms of: "How can I help? What can I do?" Well, the least I could do was to continue traveling to help my friend. I decided to be a non-complaining monk and just do what my sifu wanted me to do and no longer ask for anything for myself. Wherever I could help I would do that, without asking for any special privileges.

Here in Faerun, I have found that one really has to give up any selfish desires for practicing the Way. Following the Way in Faerun forces one to be selfless, whereas in Shou Lung practicing the Way can feed selfishness very much. The reason why is that there aren’t many options in Faerun to practice the Way. The teachings have not taken root here, and there is not as much infrastructure to support the monastic life. So generally the attitude is one of "how can I best help and how can I serve?" This is the advantage of living in Faerun as a monk of the Way: one can’t be selfish here! It’s just an inappropriate attitude and way of behaving for a monk.

All of us should recognize how we can help each other. Do we really care or take an interest in serving and trying to help in various ways? This journal will be available in the Temple of Ilmater soon, and I want to encourage everyone through these writings. A city is as good as the citizens of the city. One person can’t make this city good herself. The goodness of a community depends on all of its members. This is for your consideration. If we want to have a really good home and a place that is worth living in, then we all have to give to it something. We all have to give ourselves to it by opening our hearts and taking on responsibilities. Being sensitive to the needs and the type of people we are with, the time and the place and the kind of culture we are in – all of this is part of being mindful.

Sister Reine and the others at the temple of Ilmater demonstrate non-self daily. To offer our services and to be eager to help is really praiseworthy. It is something I appreciate very much. It is not always what one wants to do, but it is a very lovely gesture and very important.

((Adapted from the works of Ajahn Sumedho))

[Arn]

Mindfulness Of Breath

In my travels, I have met many monks and seen many different forms of meditation. Here is the meditation taught by the monks of my monastery.

As a preliminary matter, sit comfortably, with your back straight. Close your eyes. Relax your body from the top of your head down to the soles of your feet, and then back up again.

Then watch the breath where it makes contact with your nostrils. Watch one inhalation, being mindful from the beginning to the end. One inhalation, that’s it. And then watch the exhalation, mindful from beginning to end.

Don't control or regulate the breath. This is important. Everyone breathes, but most people never pay attention to it. Here, we are just paying attention to that natural process of breathing. This is not the controlled breathing exercises of ki. Simply be aware of the sensation of the breath passing through your nostrils with each inhalation and exhalation.

If a thought or distraction comes into your mind, just note the thought, emotion, worry, or whatever. Then gently but firmly go back to the breath, without getting upset or judging yourself for wandering. In the beginning of a meditation session, when your mind is wandering more, you might have to use a little force to go back to the breath.

If a feeling is so strong you feel like you can't go back to the breath, don't push yourself too hard. Instead, note the attachment to the feeling, watch the habit or tendency that is the underlying cause of the feeling. If you look closely, you can notice a certain gravitation towards the feeling. Watch that gravitation; don't follow it, don't fight it, don't judge it. Just watch it, note it.

And once it is gone, go back to the breath.

[Arn]

The Purpose Of The Way

In my travels in Shou Lung, a woman once asked me "What is the purpose of the Way?"

The Way itself has no purpose. It simply is. Truth is.

But we follow the Way because we seek freedom from suffering.

Take the example of worry. We worry a lot. Worry itself is the problem. Worry is a process. It has steps. Anxiety is not just a state of existence but a procedure. What you've got to do is to look at the very beginning of that procedure, those initial stages before the process has built up momentum. The very first link of the worry chain is the grasping/rejecting reaction. As soon as some phenomenon pops into the mind, we try mentally to grab onto it or push it away. That sets the worry response in motion. Luckily, there is a handy little tool called meditation which you can use to head off this whole mechanism.

((Adapted from Mindfulness in Plain English, by Venerable Henepola Gunaratana))

[Arn]

Compassion, Non-Violence, And The Undead

After speaking with Wai Li and Sveta, I am contemplating joining the efforts to fight the undead. Although both the Way and Eldath teach non-violence, to fight the undead is not violence. The undead are no longer alive; to destroy them is not killing.

But there is more to it than that. Destroying the undead is an act of compassion. In the case where an undead still contains a soul, destroying it frees the soul from its perverse suffering and torment. And if the undead is merely an empty animated husk, destroying it is no more violent than breaking bricks.

If we were to see a weeping child locked in a cage, we would of course smash open the cage to free the child. Just so, selfless duty calls upon us to destroy the undead to save poor souls from their suffering.

[Arn]

Somewhere beyond the light of the sun, and over the course of several hours

The monk sits on the floor near the fireplace with his eyes closed. He watches his breath as it passes through his nose.

• Inhalation.
  
  Exhalation.

As memories, thoughts, and feelings come to his mind, he observes them in turn.

• School of Necromancy. Vampire. Irrtana's casual acceptance of the vampire. Horror that there exists an entire school dedicated to raising the undead.

The monk tries to go back to his breath, but the feeling of horror is strong, so strong that his mind will not stay on his breath. The monk turns his awareness to the feeling of horror and watches it. He watches the workings of his mind, mindful of the obsessive tendency to grasp at thoughts, careful to not get caught in compulsive thinking.

• Horror at the perversion of undeath. Desire to free the soul perverted by undeath. Aversion to the undead. Aversion.
  
  Ah. The mind is currently caught in the instinctive desire/aversion reaction. All right.
  
  This is the Way it is. Watch the desire and aversion without further reaction. No attempt to annihilate the feeling or condition. It has to be this way, because it can’t be any other way at this moment. Watch the aversion – this is the Way it is right now.
  
  Ah. The mind is calming.

With a calmer mind, the monk turns his thoughts to his current situation.

• Surrounded by great darkness. There is great suffering here. This is the Way it is.
  
  But saying "this is the Way it is" is not an approval or a refusal to do anything. Having understood the Way it is at this moment, can anything be done?
  
  The memory of a metaphor: the world is like a lotus pond. Some lotuses float on the surface. Some lotuses are partially submerged. Still more lotuses are completely under the water. The School of Necromancy is completely under the water, beyond the light of wisdom.
  
  Many wizards there. Attempts to save the soul of the vampire will result in failure and death. Cannot force minds to change. No control there.
  
  Ultimately, impossible to control the world. All things subject to conditions, all things impermanent. Attachment to a desired outcome causes suffering. Grasping and clinging cause suffering.
  
  Mindful of the cause of suffering, let go.

The monk turns his mind back to his breath.

• Inhalation.
  
  Exhalation.

Watching his breath, he waits.

[Arn]

The Space Between Feeling and Craving

Dependent on feeling, craving arises.

And between feeling and craving there is a space. A space which can become the battlefield where the rounds of suffering can be brought to an end. This battle determines whether bondage will continue indefinitely into the future, or whether it will be replaced by enlightenment and liberation.

Instead of yielding to craving and the driving thirst for pleasure, if a person contemplates with mindfulness and awareness the nature of feelings and understands them as they are, he can prevent craving from solidifying, arising, and sustaining renewed suffering in the future. By employing wisdom, we can stop the process of becoming right at the point where feeling arises, preventing it from resulting in further craving and suffering.

So the link between feeling and craving is the vital battleground where the work of achieving liberation has to take place.

We have to be mindful and clearly aware of the feelings that arise associated with our sense experience. Do not buy into them. If we're not mindful and understanding, then when pleasant feeling arises, there will be craving. We will relish the object, become attached to it, desire more of the pleasure it gives.

But if there is mindfulness, we become aware: "A pleasant feeling has arisen." We stop at the awareness of the pleasant feeling without succumbing to it, without allowing the defilements to cluster around it.

Then applying wisdom to our mindfulness, we understand the feeling is impermanent, unsatisfactory, without a self, insubstantial. It is merely an impersonal egoless process. These measures prevent the feeling from giving rise to craving.

We can see feeling as it arises, changes, and falls away. We can see how feeling arises, changes, and falls away in dependence on its conditions.

And what are the conditions of feeling? Feeling arises in dependence on contact between the consciousness, the sense faculties, and the object of the senses. When a man sees a beautiful woman, there is contact between his consciousness, his eyes, and the woman as a sense object. Thus does feeling arise.

When the man no longer sees the woman, that feeling ceases. There may be a different feeling as he continues to think about the woman, but that feeling is dependent on contact between his consciousness, his mind as a sense faculty, and memory as a sense object. It is a different feeling, dependent on different conditions.

If we are mindful of impermanent changing conditions, and mindful of how the process of feeling depends on those conditions, we become less and less deluded by feeling.

((Adapted from a lecture by Bhikku Bodhi))