Page 52 of 121

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 4:24 pm
by Hoihe
http://www.spike.com/video-clips/o8nmmr/eds-cat-herding


Also


Upon the launching of a newly completed ship, a bottle of champagne is usually smashed over the bow to christen it. The origins of this are a little unclear and can vary slightly from culture to culture, but for the most part it is believed that blood or wine, depending on the particular culture, was originally used as a sacrifice to the gods of the sea to allow for a smooth passage.

Over time this became wine by those who originally used blood, and the wine was poured first into a silver chalice, from which a sip was taken before spilling the wine over the ship and casting the chalice into the sea.

After 1689, William the III of Britain, in an effort to cut costs, ordered the Royal Navy to break a bottle of liquor against the ship's side instead.

During the early 1800's, the Prince Regent set in place the custom of choosing a woman to perform the ceremony. The bottle was then to be held by the neck and thrown against the ship; however the rules had to change again after one particular bottle missed the ship and hit a spectator.

As for how the wine turned into champagne, champagne has always been associated with birth and celebration, while also having no religious association.

saw the following over at geeks to go
"Real whatever don't ... "

“if you notace i don't capitalise anything... its just the way i type.. i mean im not typeing a paper for college.. so i reely don't care about proper typeing im a programmer, not a typist... the only time i care about capitalise or spelling is if it affects my varable names or something like that... besides that i don't care... “

I started the following on a VB Programmer Site. The first 7 are mine. The rest came from others.

Real programmers don't know how to spell words which are not keywords in their favorite language. A smart human can decrypt misspelled words.

Real programmers do not document their code. If it was tuff for them to write, why should it be easy for anybody else to understand?

Real programmers don’t use 4 digit years. They use 5 digits, and are prepared for the year 10,000 & beyond.

Real Programmers never work 9 to 5. If any Real Programmers are around at 9:00 am, its because they were up all night.

Real programmers cannot do arithmetic. That is what computers are used for.

Real programmers use the most obscure esoteric techniques possible. It is more important to impress other programmers than to get the application working sooner.

Real programmers do not care about the real world. Programming is a goal in itself, not a means to an end.

Real VB programmers never say "It's Impossible", they just say that they haven't done it yet!

Real Programmers never make mistakes, they just point out that it hasn't been debugged yet!

Real Programmers have no use for managers. Managers are a necessary evil. They exist only to deal with personnel bozos, bean counters, senior planners, and other mental defectives.

Real Programmers don't believe in schedules. Planners make up schedules. Managers "firm up" schedules. Frightened coders strive to meet schedules. Real Programmers ignore schedules.

Real programmers don't test their code, that's what users are for.

Real game programmers write 1000 more lines of code if it makes the game 0.5 FPS faster on a computer that nobody uses any more.

Reel programmers dew knot say it can knot bee dun. Buy the weigh, I no that this is awl write because my spell checker says sew.

A programmer would miss his brother’s wedding to finish a program. A real programmer would miss his own wedding to finish a program.

Real programmers use 10 lines of code to do something that can be done in one, just because it looks more impressive.

Either that or use 1 line of code to do something they ought to use 10 for, just because it looks more complicated.

Real programmers use binary machine code. If it's good enough for the computer, it's good enough for them.

Real programmers don't make minor errors: They just say they are quirks of the system.

Real programmers don't distribute beta versions, they do not want to be confused with Microsoft.

Real programmers think Windows is lame.

Real programmers think all the natural food groups are covered by pizza and coke.

Real programmers don’t come to Internet Forums and discuss what real programmers do and don’t do.

Real Programmers don't read manuals. Reliance on a reference manual is the hallmark of the novice and the coward.

Real Programmers never write memos on paper. They send memos via computer mail networks.

Real programmers don't have time for "normal" friends

If I related to about 80% of those, does that mean I can call myself a real programmer yet? God, help me.....

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 4:32 pm
by Hoihe
Image


"You show an acquaintance of yours a new song. Nobody is interested.
3 months later everyone is listening to it just because it was played in the radio."

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Mon Sep 24, 2012 1:54 am
by Ivan38Rus
Something reminded me of the good old days of Ultima Online

Image

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Mon Sep 24, 2012 10:07 am
by Passiflora
X-walling.... :lol: I'm feeling nostalgic.

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Mon Sep 24, 2012 3:31 pm
by Hoihe
Ever wondered how the Black orc war would end up if we had a buttload of FS/Paladins?


Look at what one can do:



Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Tue Sep 25, 2012 3:17 pm
by Servin
Image

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Tue Sep 25, 2012 9:15 pm
by Servin
PvP

Woman vs Car


Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Tue Sep 25, 2012 11:27 pm
by Passiflora
Image




D:

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Wed Sep 26, 2012 2:19 am
by Hoihe
Why five?

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Sun Sep 30, 2012 6:15 am
by Hoihe
True Confessions of a Golfer

A man goes to the confessional. "Forgive me father, for I have sinned."

"What is your sin, my child?" the priest asks back.
"Well," the man starts, "I used some horrible language this week and I feel absolutely terrible."
"When did you do use this awful language?" said the priest.
"I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like it was going to go over 250 yards, but it struck a phone line that was hanging over the fairway and fell straight down to the ground after going only about 100 yards."
"Is that when you swore?"
"No, Father." Said the man. "After that, a squirrel ran out of the bushes and grabbed my ball in his mouth and began to run away."
"Is THAT when you swore?" asked the priest again.
"Well, no," said the man, "You see, as the squirrel was running, an eagle came down out of the sky, grabbed the squirrel in his talons and began to fly away!"
"Is THAT when you swore?" asked the amazed priest.
"No, not yet." The man replied. "As the eagle carried the squirrel away in his claws, it flew towards the green. And as it passed over a bit of forest near the green, the squirrel dropped my ball."
"Did you swear THEN?" asked the now impatient priest.
"No, because as the ball fell it struck a tree, bounced through some bushes, careened off a big rock, and rolled through a sand trap onto the green and stopped within six inches of the hole."
"You missed the %#$*& putt, didn't you?" sighed the priest.

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2012 9:04 am
by Valefort
Image

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2012 10:03 am
by Hoihe
DUN DUN DUN!
Valefort wrote:Image

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2012 6:49 pm
by Servin
Image

:lol:

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Mon Oct 08, 2012 12:14 am
by Ivan38Rus

Re: A few NEW ha ha's worth

Posted: Mon Oct 08, 2012 8:19 am
by Hoihe
Servin wrote:Image

:lol:

I remember the same joke being in Horrible Histories.