Your party can often help with saves. Once you have your target AC, AB, and damage down pack, the rest of the party can deal with most things you lack.
As far as defense goes, Dwarven defender is (of course) a good class. Dervish is a lovely class as well, it provides ample defense as well as offence. Defensive stance aside, it may be a little more dex based, but it provides +3 AC as well as providing tumble (2 AC) as a class skill. If you are going for an INT/DEX combo, duelist is lovely as well.
Man at Arms, while a bit more intensive level-wise, could also be used for a defensive melee character. As long as it also has 12 fighter for offense, it could be alright.
Divine Champion can help with saves, if that is trouble.
@AC81, I'd change that order up a bit
For a melee character (who's primary job is to provide a sustainable offense with the occasinal (brief) body-blocking):
AB (You can't do damage if you can't hit anything, and if you can't deal damage, you are worthless)
Damage (If you can't do damage, then hitting is worthless and you are worthless)
AC (You need to make sure not to be hit as much as possible to keep hitting)
Health (If you can't survive being hit, then you won't be able to hit very long)
Damage Avoidance (See Health and AC)
Saves (Like AC, but for certain situations. High Fort saves, you'll have, and that clears up most insta-death situations. Its the will/reflex CC situations this helps you mitigate.)
Utility (Stuff to help your party or yourself, like KD, Expose Weakness, UMD, etc. Its not your role, but it'll help if you have it.)
Your party should be able to help you with AB, AC, Saves, and Damage Avoidance. You need to help yourself for Damage, Health, and most of AB/AC however (for AB/AC, they can only help you so much).
Something I've noticed, not sure if it was mentioned already: Mobs tend to be a little higher on health than AC. I'd still pump all you can regardless, however.
Here is a build I worked out at one point:
http://nwn2db.com/build/?211713
It has AB, Damage, Damage Mitigation, HP, Decent Will/Fort saves, and utility (expose weakness, KD, full UMD, and healing). Its reflex saves and its AC are subpar.