A Forgetful Halflings Journal.

[taylorstar]

My name Is Norman Medune I was given this Journal by Terri, Kitty and Vendor, I am told I have forgotten much and that there is much I do not remember, this Journal was given to me to write notes down so that I can try to remember what I am forgetting. Yet each day I wake up in a strange room, its big and the bed is comfortable and vast, There are notes on the wall telling me to check this book and I am told the room is mine even though I have never seen it before, or is it that I am not remembering that it is mine, I am uncertain how many times I have woken in this room, how many times I have been told that it is mine or how many more times I will be told such.

At the back of this book I will write the names of people and describe them, these people I am told are my friends and have been for a long time. It is with great shame if true that I have forgotten them I hope maybe they will forgive me and not take offence, I still do not know why I can not remember them, I only hope that I do not forget them tomorrow, maybe writing notes about them will allow me to know them when I wake up the next day or day after.

I am told I am part of a company, called the Phoenix Company, I have keys and a pin and everyone here treats me well and friendly but I am very unsure of what my role is here or what they do, for now I know that the companies home is on the Sword Coast and I am very far away from home, I am unsure of how I got here or how long I have been away, I feel safe here and I am not in any danger, I should take my time to let this confusion clear before I make a decision and should continue to trust the Phoenix Company.

I am uncertain what my next move is but I should continue to check the notes left in my room reminding me of this book, I hope I do not forget it, I want to remember these friends of mine I do not wish to forget them.

[taylorstar]

At the back of the halflings journal is a page dedicated to each name he lists, offering his views and descriptions of each name.



Alyndra

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Description
Alyndra is a darker skinned elf her skin is a browny colour reminding me of the bark of trees and chestnuts, she has a a tanned light brown boarder line blond hair, she wears a nice red dress with arm bands. she seems quite tall and slender as do most elves though she looks a bit more rugged and wild than the most of the elves here at the party.

History
She greeted us at the party, and knew me and that I am forgetful too, she told me I had a boar companion that most likely misses me, I do not know of this boar companionm, she told me she is occasionally seen with a copper dragon named Ro, I have never seen a dragon in my life, I wonder if its true that she is friends with one.

My feelings
I do not know this person she claimed to be a druidess and friend a dragon, and said I was a friend with a boar, I find it really odd to hear that I am uncertain of what to think on either of those points, I find it hard to believe however.

Kitty

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Description
Kitty is a tall lady she is very friendly and happy very bubbly she has very long silvery white hair tied up in a really big and bushy pony tail

History
She helped look for a journal and found one for me to write in, I do not know what my history is with this person she seems caring so perhaps we was friends maybe I helped her? I do not know.

My Feelings
I get the sense she is moving forward, progressing in something she is very proud and happy to be doing, a sense of accomplishment. She is a Ranger in training, I wonder what that is like I am curious as to why she is taking that path and what it is to become a ranger I was told it was about tracking and understanding the tracks you find and knowing what tracks you find and what they can tell, perhaps its like reading a book but natures book?

Sirion

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Description
Sirion is a male silver haired elf with a long ponytail with a pale skin he wears a brown headband and a darkblue clothing it looks quite simple, he is very tall and quite skinny

History
He claims he has known me for over a year and we have many mutual acquaintances but have not spoken a great deal, he mentioned we met in his village in the wood of sharp teeth, and said I was more welcome there than most non elves.

I have apparently forgotten him around a bakers dozen of times

My feelings
This man seems to be a friend to me, he is calm and relaxed, his heart seems to be in his head he is a thinker, I trust this man, though I do not know what our history, if he speaks I find myself listening and studying his words, yet he is leaving much for me to figure out on my own.

Terri

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Description
Terri is a very pretty young blond haired lady, her hair flows down over both sides of her shoulders her eyes are a strange colour and she has a very sweet smile, She sits very close to me.

History
She seems to conduct herself with a comfort and familiarity with me, to call me her brother and say I was there at her wedding, I wonder how close we were, and for how long and what brought about this curious friendship.

My Feelings
Behind her smile I can see she is worried I sense something weighing very heavily on her She seems to be putting a great deal of effort into looking after me, though I am fine, She claims I was a maid of honour at her wedding with Vendor, I am uncertain as to who is more confused between the two of us at this point. She spoke of many things of the past and calls me a member of her family and says I am like a little brother to her, I am sure in height that might be true but I don't know what it means to be part of her family or my place here.

For now I trust her and should listen to her, trust her, maybe one day I will understand why she calls me family.

Vendor

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Description
Vendor is an elf he has light brown hair, he is quite tall slightly broad shouldered he sits quite stiff opposite me he has an outdoors look to him from his cloak and clothes, he wears a headband of some kind is he part of some kind of order? There is some kind of symbolism maybe from his elven culture that I do not understand.


History
He is married to Terri and is very friendly with Kitty too, perhaps they are all some kind of strange family, I am uncertain of how this family works but the affection between the three is sincere

My Feelings
He sits across the fire watching over me, I feel he is watching over and guarding all of us, he sits distant so as not to be directly involved I can see his concern but he is not trying to take action that may adversely change things until he has observed the situation and is certain that intervention is necessary. He seems very hard working and commited I think I should trust him too, Though I am uncertain of what our friendship meant to one another, I think it is his wife that bound us together however I am unsure.

[taylorstar]

notes depicting land marks and a crude map drawn indicates the path the hin has travelled over the last few days with small notes symbols and words added as further descriptions.

The path so far indicates that the Halfling has travelled from the Phoenix company lodge and followed the trail to candlekeep depictions of dangerous habitats from orcs to ogres

Flamerule 28

I have been travelling a route well travelled, it seems there is lots of traffic that takes this path from between the lodge to an inn called the Friendly Arm Inn and a place out on the coast a little keep called Candlekeep, this day I managed to reach the Candlekeep but I think I got turned around and confused, I am not sure, I was hoping that by going to the ocean I may have some better idea of where I am or that I would recognize or remember something.

Apparently I have visited the keep many times, a few since after I had lost my memory too, I don't know this place however I do not recall it, I was returning to the Lodge I think when i encountered two strange men, one seemed to know me and was aware that I am currently unable to remember things, the other was a man shrouded in shadows and red armor, I feel uneasy about this man, he offered me a strange red vial, I was hesitant to take it and most certainly would not drink from it.

The man who knew me cast some kind of spell and vanished departing after pointing me the direction of the Phoenix company lodge. The man shrouded in shadows said he could take me there, I was unsure at first but in the blink of an eye the road we was standing on had turned into a forest he guided me back to the bridge close to the lodge I am unsure how we got there, I think it was magic.

I am back at the lodge again I think it best to jot down this day, so I do not forget.

Oh I have company, an elf with Silver hair.

[taylorstar]

Today I was taken to some an elf festival a village of which the journey to get get there was both perilous and lengthy, I was taken by Vendor Terri and Kitty and elf who I am uncertain of, he joked of my execution I was worried it was true and that I had commited a crime I was unknowing off, in this strange place there is one thing I can be certain of, nothing it certain, I was unsure what to make of him.

I trust Terri, and she guided me by the hand all the way there with Vendor and Kitty drawing away all the trouble we would of run into from bandits and highwaymen to orcs and boars. The route past the friendly arm inn is a dangerous one, I do not think it should be attempted alone I will add it to the map I have drawn and make sure not to follow that route.

We arrived outside the village gates of Doron Amar, the elven village. made of simple stone and a lengthy iron gate sat behind a lengthy and deep moat and a bridge as slim as the elves themselves. I wonder how they could ever bring their goods into their village with such a narrow path, to small for a wagon but big enough for a wheelbarrow maybe though only one at a time, it seems very impractical to me. There were elves as far as I could see when I arrived in trees and on towers armed with bows, and behind the gates strange moving statues that glowed with magic I think they were golems.

Its so strange to see so many guards though so close to a forest that must be filled with as many orcs as there are trees I could understand their caution. We was greeted by elves I think one of them was the Sirion in my journal, I was told I knew the female elf, I think she is a sun elf her hair fair and skin kissed by the sun would make a conclusion most likely. We was allowed passage into the village by them though little was said, following the path brought us to the village square, the terrain very hilly with a river running through the center of the village its water both sparkling and clear, underneath a bridge there was thunderous waterfall with the water flowing rapidly down it, This small village and its Terrain does well to describe the elven people and their variety.

At the square we was greeted by a woman and I was told to make note of her by Terri and I have done so, she told me I had a boar companion and friend, it seems odd to me for that to be the case, I try not to make friends with things that may one day be my food an how a boar could be a companion or friend is an odd thought indeed but I have heard of stranger pets, she claimed a dragon was hers, I have yet to see a dragon, I think maybe she is stretching the truth somewhat.

The village square was neatly cobbled with fine stone masonry and trees flowers and vines elegantly complementing the furnishings, there were many people already here and more arriving every moment, we found a bench which helped seclude us but with so many people I found it hard to observe, to focus so many people and so much going on with music and drink and talk and song, it reminded me much of the taverns at Beluir, I was shown the direction of the tavern and on the way there we stopped to talk to a couple, I am told the woman Alexandra was once my closest friend behind Terri. I do not recall her I am saddened to hear that I am unable to remember my friends and it is something I am told often, I must of had many, and have forgotten them all. This is something that will weight heavily on my heart... and my mind for however long it will allow.

Vendor has reserved a room for me and from what I can tell it is very fancy, a room fit for a king and no doubt cost a kingdom for a stay. My families name was in the guest book multiple times though we had to go through many pages to get there, that too was my writing yet I do not remember writing it, or ever recall being here.

When we returned to the party it was even more loud and even more crowded and more people who knew of me but I did not know them, elves she spoke in broken common I suspect she may not be off common civilization though her dress was beautiful perhaps one of the wilder elves that lives out in the forests themselves rather than the quaint hamlet this village is.

There were a great many people at the festival in truth I found it all to overwhelming to stay in such a crowd, with all the noises and sounds and smells and the fireworks that would light up the sky, it was all a little too much for me, I am sure I was once better at parties than this, though as I look in a mirror I see an older man tired and gaunt, it is hard to recognize me I wonder what has happened, and what will happen next.

The people seemed happy at this festival and that is what festivals are all about I find comfort in seeing the peoples happiness and their affection for one another, I hope the comfort and warmth of such feelings will allow me to sleep through the uncertainty of not knowing what happens in the coming days or if I will even remember writing this, will I even wake up tomorrow? I just don't know.

[taylorstar]

It is with fondness I write this entry into this page. I have found my memory my mind pieced and patched back together and I have returned home, home to the Phoenix family and its lodge, when I first came back to the coast I was unsure of what I would find, who I would find and how I would find them, I thank Yondalla that they are in such great health, but...

I do not remember writing these pages and I do not remember the events that have transpired within these words, I do not remember meeting my friends again for the first time, a second time. It is good to see that in times of uncertainty my ability to see into a persons heart for who they are was able to tell me of who are good people even if I was unsure at the time. I may leave those entries in the back just for nostalgia and charm. Something to smile at even if the time itself was a sad one.

Terri bought me this journal, she has always been so good to me even when I have done nothing to deserve such effort on her part for her to go so far out of her way at times, she is truly my angel and my best friend, I missed a very important moment in her life and I am deeply ashamed of myself for allowing what happened to me to come about. I have told her of how it was my fault, the mistake I made in a life long ago, the mistake that will haunt me for the rest of my life, I have told her and Vendor they are like one to me, I am happy for their marriage.

Since my return much has changed, I feel a strange sense like I am a man stuck with a foot in the past, and a foot in the present and yet despite this I feel like I am always behind in the past when really I should be in the future, is a strange feeling one I do not know how to describe well but I feel like I am living two memories at the same time maybe three, of this I am uncertain. I look at my friends and where I to write about them in a book much like this one I would be like someone has written a line of text on top of another line of text, the words and letters smashed together like some kind of intangible scribble, this causes me much uncertainty. To help shift this I must move forward and leave the past behind, I need to work on the future, a better one where the problems of the past and present are mended. I hope writing about my goals will give me the focus I need to pursue them.

Terri has recently come back to lead the Phoenix Company after a recent gathering after a recent vote, I remember back when I first joined, Terri's drive how hard and passionately she worked in the name of the phoenix family, the many friends she brought in, the burden placed upon her by those external with their judging eyes, their jealousy fueling malicious actions and rumors, I will do all I can once more to support Terri to have our family grow vastly our activity across the coast shall boom once again and the family name will be heard up and down the coast again bringing hope and joy and good spirits to all.

Alexandra is still guide of Candlekeep, it was good to see her again, she has grown into a fine young woman, standing tall and resilient like a mighty oak tree, but like a tall oak, she has weathered many storms, She has a new partner, a half giant I think? named Rokh. In my absence I have found that Isabella and Alexandra have fallen out. My two very dear friends, may angels, I at first found myself trying to accept that friends may not like one another but their friendship their bond as I remember was a source of strength not just for me but for them too! Isabella may never be part of Candlekeep again but maybe I can rekindle their friendship, I will have to work hard to try and open dialogue between them, even harder to open their hearts to one another again.

Elyssa is still yet someone I have to find again I have heard from Sirion she spends much time in the Wizard Tower though I have yet to find her, I safely navigated my way to Doron Amar avoiding the giant spider, if its a member of the same family of the one that keeps popping up each year then I know I am no match for it now in my present condition, it makes travelling there harder and my opportunities to make such a journey. I heard that Viridiana turned her back on Elyssa and the coast, just up and turned her back on her without saying a word without anyone knowing until after she was gone I worry for Elyssa and her well being, I worry for her, I worry for Doron Amar and the rest of the coast. Viridiana was an angel one who I believed had the same qualities I did, the potential the power to bring people together I could see it in her, when friends where falling apart she pulled them together, It showed even in my absence when the Council of light tried to isolate a dear friend she stood up for what was true and friendship. She was the only other person I trusted who could wear my hat, I am unsure who else can do that on the coast at this time.


The Elder Circle, my dear friend Nai missed me she welcomed me back with hugs I need her help sorely and have started to join the Elder Circle, I wish to be closer to my friends and those who protect and nurture nature but my motivations are selfish, I hope they can forgive me I wish to know how best to aid them and further their goals and hopefully in exchange I will have earned their help, not from their perspective their hearts are pure and good and would do anything for me were I to ask, but in my own heart and mind I need to have earned it. I have heard that there is a unicorn that inhabits the grove, I have never seen a Unicorn but the stories I have heard makes them sound of unrivaled beauty with an aura and light that dispels uncertainty and fear, It is something I need I hope if i meet one I can get the clarity I need to remove those things that anchor me to my past. I also have lost a friend, a companion, my boar Mesmor, I worry for him having lost myself for a long time to lose him too, he must of missed me, I know him to be capable of surviving but I need to know he is ok, I hope the grove can help me find him again, I do not know how to start searching for my companion but if anyone knows where to start it will be the grove.

Hoihe is someone I have let down, I promised never to forget my mistake, I hold my friends so very dear and my failings toward them as a friend is unforgivable I had promised never to forget my failings but is exactly what has happened, I do not know how I can redeem myself but I hope to meet them again to know they are fine to seek forgiveness for breaking my promise, remember the first time we sat down together for a lengthy discussion was over a transformation they had undergone, I was concerned for them, as I am concerned for myself now, worried I may lose myself to my fears and insecurities, the knowledge Hoihe has for Alchemy may be a slim chance but perhaps he will know something that can help me, though I have no right to ask for their help, I can only hope I get the chance to earn that.

This is many words I should narrow down this page with my goals make them smaller digestible bites to focus on.

• Assist Terri in bringing the Phoenix company back to the forefront of the coast.
  Reunite my friends who have drifted far apart to reunite the coast and strengthen our bonds.
  Visit my friend Elyssa and tend to her needs as she tends to the elves.
  Join the Elder circle and further their goals and get closer to my friends.
  Reunite with Mesmor.
  Seek Hoihe out earn forgiveness see if they know of certain brews
  Seek out a high priest-----it is not the time to be thinking of myself.

As a side note to all this I really like the scribble writing down about my friends, I should continue it to write down about those I meet and my friends once again, it is a charming way to look back at fond memories of my friends and should I ever forget, I hope to remind myself of them, of what is important.

[taylorstar]

The road has been long and the distance I have to travel is far, the path I follow looks to be as impassible as it is impossible, all up hill with the wind blowing against me, it reminds me of many stories back home and amongst my kin about the path of least resistance but the rewards of perseverance.

I have spoken to Isabella, upon reflection she is amongst the longest of my friendships on the coast and someone I have taken for granted too much, I assumed her resilience her strength and toughness were unrivaled and that her heart would be as tough as stone, but I forget stone can erode and crumble over time, she told me her side of what transpired between her and Alexandra and for how long it went on for, how much it hurt her, yet she endured for so long, I wish I had noticed when it started, wish I had been here at her side to try and remedy this, maybe if I had not been gone the two would still be friends, this is another of my faults a punishment for my failing of that I am sure and now the whole coast will suffer due to the lack of unity between two very powerful and very dear friends of mine.

I am unsure where to begin, I hope to seek out Alexandra to talk more on this subject that may be still painful and sore for her, I will have to tread as gently as an elf and just as graceful if I'm to open the door for their friendship again, yet I have no idea how to approach this, I will just have to wing it and improvise, is better done that way less chance of being dishonest to my friends or myself.

Vendor went on a patrol of the reaching woods, I joined him and as we prepared to patrol the route we spoke of events, I asked for his advice on how to proceed with the problem that lay before me and he told me that my best friend Terri and Alexandra had also fallen out of good graces with one another, I knew it was a possibility that could happen, there was a few times Terri had judged Alexandra poorly based on her partner at the time, though understandable in some cases. When I had returned I tried to spend as much time with my two angels the two i hold dearest on the coast, to know there is a divide between the two of them weights heavy on my heart, this strange sense of duality I experience, I still think of myself as though I was the me of over a year ago still on the coast with my friends all happy and united but with a blink I am brought back to the present to see how divided we are, I know that time can be cruel but to see what a year can do in but a moment just makes it all the more clearer.

To reform the friendships and bonds of Alexandra with Terri and Isabella seems like an impossible mountain to climb, maybe more time would allow hurt nerves to heal and irritation to fade, but I do not have forever to wait I will have to proceed soon but not rush.

During the Patrol with Vendor I managed to pass my trials, I suspect I was shown a great deal of favoritism, the challenges were hard yes, but I passed them all, I was sure I would fail having seen how difficult a time Teris had trying to pass his first one. My first trial was to collect plants and knowledge on the green deities, fortunately I have been close to nature and respected it all my life, I was able to pass this trial though it took a great deal of time.

The second Trial had me scouting and tracking many creatures from gnolls to ogres and other goblinoids, again fortunate I have studied orc and goblinoids, the trial favoured me if there is anything I have an easier time tracking it is those I snuck through their camp their number was vast and returned to Vendor to inform him, we chose discretion and not to fight them due to an earlier incident which later counted as the passing of my third trial, a trial by combat.

We had scouted through the reaching woods when we saw a particularly large pack of gnolls in a cluster, Vendor decided that a culling was in order, not that I refute it these woods hold a very important memory of a dear friend of mine, Rilae, she would hate to see the forest as it is now overrun by these laughing tainted hyenas. We had a sound strategy to deal with them Vendor would face the gnolls head on and I would strike from behind with my bow, it was quite effective until the packs leader approached in the chaos I don't think Vendor immediately noticed the threat this one presented, it nearly killed him I had to draw sword and shield and intervene directly I received more than a few scrapes for my efforts but it was enough to buy Vendor the time to recover and strike the monster down. I remember my promise to him, to do all I can to make sure he and Terri live a long happy life together to see their good future come true. I won't let him be struck down, not in front of me no matter the price I pay.

In truth the hardest part of the trial was the first one, I would frequently scourer the reaching woods for the plant needed, very illusive and difficult to harvest even when found, but that was not the most difficult part no, the most difficult part was being in the woods themselves I would find myself losing track of time thinking of my dear departed angel Rilae, I wish she were here more than ever I wonder if she would of been able to help me, if she could heal what I have done to myself, we shared so many troubles, yet I never shared her mine, never told her of my greatest shame and I watched as she repeated mistakes I had once made. Though I also wonder if she would judge me poorly for it and my failings perhaps as harshly as I judge myself if not more so. I remember giving her my sword once hoping she would fight her way back to me from what dangers had snatched her away from me, when she returned she blessed my weapon, when she returned she handed me my sword back its runes glowed beautify on the blade, to this day I preserve their imprint though the magic has long been gone like Rilae.

My sword was a gift from a dear friend before Terri she was my best friend, Belladonna. I have the leaf of the same name engraved on my sword a reminder as to who gave it to me, though as I look at my sword it doesn't feel like a gift anymore, more like a burden, a curse that I carry, I am reminded a sword does not give life but take it, perhaps fitting that of all the gifts I carry on my person is the only one that has been touched by those no longer with us, I worry this sword will become a mausoleum, nothing more than notes of the many friends I have and will lose.

Its strange as I look back at the goals I have set for myself after all my hard work towards them only feel like I have added more and the difficulty of achieving the ones I set myself is that much further and more difficult to achieve.

To the list I add this

• Find a way to honour Rilae
  Find a way to honour Belladonna
  Rekindle the friendship of Alexandra and Isabella
  Rekindle the friendship of Alexandra and Terri

from my previous list

• Assist Terri in bringing the Phoenix company back to the forefront of the coast.
  Reunite my friends who have drifted far apart to reunite the coast and strengthen our bonds.
  Visit my friend Elyssa and tend to her needs as she tends to the elves.
  Join the Elder circle and further their goals and get closer to my friends.
  Reunite with Mesmor.
  Seek Hoihe out earn forgiveness see if they know of certain brews

As I close this book, my heart feels heavy I hope my next entry will bring more positive news and joy from my friends.

[taylorstar]

I've got it! I know now how to make up my failings towards my friend Hoihe!

Hoihe visited the lodge I was sure to give them a good cup of tea sit down and talk, I see after our very long absence from one another we feel that we are in the same boat, many of our friends isolated distant or absent, perhaps the price we pay for being that way ourselves, Hoihe was grateful in someways of my resistance towards there change in a way that helped them remain grounded in someway claiming no harm no foul, but the truth is I hurt myself also in doing so, the broken promise of a follower of Cyrrollalee has to be amended a simple acceptance and moving on from it is not enough, at least not for me, If I'm to prove that I am worthy of getting to be with them again I have to make this right.

It was my best friend Terri who gave me this idea and in perhaps it was the perfect spell she cast to inspire this, knowing the transformations Hoihe has gone through how they have suffered and endured and learned and re adjusted, my ignorance of these things, I should follow in the footsteps in my friend, though all be it with less finality. Terris spells do not last forever I should consult Hoihe on this, maybe for a day if I spent it as an elf I would understand, Terri cast a spell a transmutation spell and turned herself into a very convincing elf, I know it is not on the level of magic that Hoihe has traversed but it does not need to be, I hope.

I worry about losing myself and my identity from this spell, I know there are those that suspect Hoihe is a different person with access to their memories, I also know that elves think and behave very differently to hins, their minds work in strange ways, I am unsure how well I would handle the transformation, I would have to consult Hoihe and have my best friends at my side to make sure that if something goes wrong they will be there to once again pull me out of trouble by the scruff of my neck, I have good friends, I hope never to let them down like I have Hoihe and if I do, I hope I can make it up to them.

I have a second task now set before myself also, I need to consult Nai about calling for my animal companion, see if there is a way of a deeper or greater calling so he can hear me, as a ranger my connection to nature is limited but Nai is an arch druid she is very wise and a friend I am certain I can place my trust with this delicate matter in her hands, if anyone would know of ways to call further and for longer for my friend it would be her, I know Vendor and Terri already knew of my separation from my companion, perhaps I can not hide my grief and shame or my sadness as well as I hoped, I hoped to put on a brave face but the emptiness I feel knowing he isn't there, it is the same cold dread and emptiness I feel of not being secure in myself, my uncertainty. I hope by having him back at my side I will of at least anchored myself back on solid ground and know who I am once again for certain.

So the two goals I have set for myself now are as follows

• Penance for my mistakes and to redeem my friendship with Hoihe
  Speak to my friend Nai about summoning my companion.

I have yet to see Alexandra I am so busy and have these very important goals to resecure myself to regain the certainty in who I am, I know that Terri is open to being friends with her again, regrets the fallout between the two and would gladly walk side by side together again, I think, I hope.

Isabella will still take time she is busying herself which is good for her and I do not wish to take away from all she is achieving for herself on a personal level and the work she is doing for her husband Rania and his guild, I wish it most success, I know she has invested in it and I hope it rewards her.

I have sat with so many friends in recent times I consider myself so very blessed.