Paws the Little -------- Giant!

[ragnarok1983]

/// this post is OOC unless of course, you hear some of the tales. This is not all he has done, but a brief overview. ///

Minor and major events that have occured in-game with Paws in rough order of occurrence:

1. Started off thinking he was an Orc and was without a faith in any god. While he was not an orc, Gruumsh apparently smiled upon him. While praying nondiscriminately to any god that would hear him, an avatar of Gruumsh delivered him from the Fugue. Due in part to this, Paws became a member of the short-lived "Bloodscalp Clan," an all-orc group of warriors.

2. Became a Champion in one of the first Tournaments of Baldur's Gate. Having defeated several foes, and running around wild in the arena, "Mighty Paws" slayed the last remained warrior and was awarded the honor. (He was level 15 at the time and landed an incredibly lucky nat-20 crit with a greatsword... the ONLY hit on the surviving lvl 26 warrior... who I am pretty sure was a Stormlord... but my memory is hazy)

3. He once actually rode a dragon from near the [former] Bhaalist area to Candlekeep to spread word of the Bhaalist infestation to the defenders of the realm there. His numerous tall tales make this event just as unbelievable to anyone that would listen.

4. Was a member of the large force that eventually liberated the Bhaalist temple, which became Friendly Arms Inn. He served along his long time friend Foggy McGee as well as a knight he looked up to greatly, Jonas Rokranon. His major duties included reloading the catapaults with stone, using his incredible strength. The tireless, but unwise warrior, eventually loaded himself as ammunition and was launched over the walls where... he made a large crater until he was revived by allies.

5. Became a Guardian with the Weavemasters. Unfortunately, during his wide travels to the northern Dales, the group became defunct by the time he had returned. (left server for a bit)

6. Gave what little gold he had to the Nashkel Emporium to assist in the rebuilding of the town. It has since been completely rebuilt.

7. (left server) Traveled again, first to Icewind Dale, then inland, then back south all the way to Amn, and now has returned.

8. Was part of a force that helped to put out the fires in Nashkel after several tremors that were caused somehow by Duergar. He was also part of a group that helped defeat the Duergar. (2/14/2014)

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// A short update of sorts. Paws/Bharg can be seen roaming the area in his normal niave, happy-go-lucky way and is back to thinking he is an orc. He will happily tell you he serves Gruumsh and why.

What I didn't realise as a player, until very recently is that SirC (the DM responsible for Paws' change of faith) pulled a bit of a dirty DM move that day that now strikes me as hilarious.

As much as Paws hates Stormlords and Tallasans (now that he knows what they are), he serves Gruumsh with gusto. The irony is that Talos is an aspect of Gruumsh! SirC, I tip my hat at your twisted sense of humor. Poor Paws/Bharg! //

[ragnarok1983]

Anti-Sparkle-Stick Armor

Word had reached Paws of some light armor that was resistant to lightning and it was to sell for 20,000 gold coin. Now Paws is a somewhat typical Hin in the way that coin never stays in his pocket long. Knowing the value of such armor however, forced our little halfling so seek means of employment.

One such job came to him and posed several challenges...

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*a weasel scampers up and finds Paws, a tightly wrapped note stuck between its jaws offered to him to take, it scampers off again as soon as delivered*

Dear Paws,

I am sympathetic to your plight for coin as I find it a difficult one myself. I am willing to offer 1000GP for help with the following:

- a surprise gift to a loved one, a human man who needs but little. Such a gift must be unique and interesting, not necessarily something that one can buy off the shelf. I had thought of a song or poem from a bard, but I rarely come across such a person of late.

Eleanor

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*He receives the note and watches the weasel run off. He then reads the note a smile grows across his face and then a perplexed look follows that.*

Umm... how Paws talk back to Eleanor person? Hmm... What if Eleanor was the weasel! How Paws know which weasel to write to!?

And... how weasel get so rich?

Paws have idea!

*writes 40 small identical notes that say the following*

Paws interested in job. Paws is good at carving stuff with his Big Big Big Dagger. Maybe guy would want that? If not, Paws writes poem.

What is guy like? What you want poem about? What you want carving of?

*Paws then proceeds to take his forty or so handwritten notes and chase down all manner of small wildlife, attempting to tie notes to them.*

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*as 20 small animals all manage to find her at nearly the same time, running around and over, she is forced to sit on the ground or be smothered in their eagerness to give her their messages. She reads the second and realizes then they are all repeated. Tickles the rabbit and the ferret under the chin and shoos the others away with her kind thanks.

A return note is attached to the foot of a sparrow with instructions to stay and await any return message or leave as instructed. Eleanor has wisened up to Paws' message dilemma*

Paws,

A carved statue 'and' a poem are both great ideas. Depending on your skill, I propose a statue of a wolf and a bear in some natural pose. I would dearly love a sweet an appropriate poem as well. If you could do both for the said fee, I should be grateful.

I am going to place trust in your skills and will promise you the full amount for delivery of said gifts to one 'Raymond Hyvarinen'. If you wish and we are able to meet me to show me in advance, all well and good, else deliver said gifts in person to Raymond, telling him they come with my love. The monies I 'guarantee' are yours when we do meet should you receive but the slightest smile from that man on his receiving of them.

Eleanor

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*Paws receives the note from the frieghtened sparrow and holds down one of the bird's wings, just in case he flies off. After reading it he sends the following note with the tiny bird*

Ok Eleanor lady person! Paws is better with big-big-big daggers than words, but Paws do both. Gold is gold and Paws needs it BAD.

I go to swamp now cuz they have good trees. Paws is smart and will find big cyprus. It is good wood, very hardy to elements. Lasts loooong time and has very pretty wood grain.

Paws will leave statues with guards at Baldur's Gate if that alright. If not, you tell Paws where to leave them. Paws deliver for free.

Paws can leave them where the man will find them if you want. They gonna be BIG statues. Big like Paws! No one will miss them.

Paws work on carvings and poem in mean time.

Bye!

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Paws later receives instructions to bring the statues to the small camp outside Candlekeep. He spends several days carving a life-sized eight-foot tall bear and a broad-shouldered wolf in totem-like fashion. His unorthodox means of carving - swinging a greatsword in all manner of directions - would surely have raised a brow on any passer-by.

The bear stands on it's hind legs, a decision that made the carving quite difficult to balance as it lacks a broad base. Once finished with the carvings, he grabs several lengthy limbs with which he makes a sled of sorts to drag the heavy statues with.

Paws runs into Raymond, the intended receiver, quite by accident while on his way to Candlekeep. After a short conversation, Paws learns the man's identity and unveils the gifts he is dragging behind him. The man is nearly brought to tears by these gracious, though not finely-carved, gifts.

Just when things seem too serious Paws delivers what is perhaps the accidental crescendo of the gift package... the poem.

As Paws unfurls some parchement, which is generally used for his journal, he attempts to deliver the poem with a serious demeanor. He reads the following in attempted poetic prose:

*clears his throat a few times and conveys his nervousness to Raymond. After a long pause Paws reads...*

Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
This poem will buy
Paws a new pair of shoes.

I carved you a wolf
I carved you a bear.
It wasn't Paws' idea,
It was hers I swear!

She say's it was for love
And cuz she wants you close.
But Paws thinks cuddling
is really really gross.

The poem is very-well received. So much so that now Paws thinks that he should persue the life of a bard! May the gods have mercy on us all.

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Paws has been seen headed north to the land of Baldur's Gate. After a lengthy hunt for the elusive Eyegougerhawk to all the lands of northern and eastern Amn, he runs down the Trade Way seeking his guide, Foggy.

While wandering through the lands he finds significantly less "sparkle-stick-chuckers." He wonders if word got out that he had obtained armor that would protect him from the Tallasans and now they simply hide out of fear of Mighty Paws' return.

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*after his journey of several months, Paws finally makes his way back to Baldur's Gate. Not long after his return does Paws hear that his trusted friend Foggy McGee had returned as well. May Tymora bless the citizens of the Gate in hopes that they will be spared of Paws and his bad Gnomish influencer.*

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Paws has been absent from the lands of the Gate for a lengthy period. Many thought the Little Orc had finally hit his head one too many times. In reality, Paws had "found" a vast quantity of gold... and has been seen crawling out of taverns from Athkatla to Calimport always mumbling something about these elusive "Eyegougerhawks."

Druids have also spoken of an unexplained shortage of forest mushrooms with "medicinal" properties in the vicinity of Paws-sightings... which is surely coincidental.

Nevertheless, the Halfling has finally spent the last of his acquired coin, and has begun a long and sobering trek back to the lands of Baldur's Gate.

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[Some background info on Paws' weaponry]

"Dagger on a Stick" - A six foot long polearm with a very unique blade similiar to a blade found in the Maciejowski Bible.

"Sword Flute" - Paws will also call this his "Toothpick." Frustrated with trying to carry a flute and a sword, Paws invented the swordflute in his infinite "wisdom." It is simply a flute tied to the hilt of a 4'7" long greatsword.

"NTE Champion" - Paws won this in the first Nashkel Trade Emporium's gladiatorial games... much to the surprise of... just about everyone. It is a lightly enchanted 1'7" club.

"Dragon Bone" - It is actually the humerus of a relatively small ogre or giant which Paws later outfitted with spikes.

"Paws Sparle Stick" - A heavily enchanted club of about 1'7". Sparks shoot from the head and the base even while casually carried. It was received after looting the corpse of a Stormlord that Paws had defeated. ((Disappeared OOCly during one of my absences))

"Axes on Sticks" - Paws has two halberds and switches between the two between battles.

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Paws has returned to the surrounding areas after lengthy journies around much of Western Faerun. His scars are more numerous, as is the silver in his half-mangy locks of hair --- though his patchy facial hair retains a more youthful colors of reddish brown. After his many years, Paws shows some early signs of slowing down physically, though mentally he is just as unpredictable and scatter-brained as he has always been.

The past-his-prime Hin has reluctantly abandoned his search for the elusive Eyegougerhawk, though he keeps a wary pulse on any mention of such a beast. He is surely only passing through the lands as he has taken to traveling more often in his progressing age. According to Paws, there is 5% less "sword-chuckery" but a 95% increase in "walkin'-feet-hurtery." He may never truly be in the bardic traditions, though he collects lore and tales to the best of his ability.

His playing of instruments remains... amateur at its best. Generally it is still a caustic noise to one's ears.

As his sword-flute would say:
*Honk-zhzhzhzhweeeeet!*