An odd scoll titled 101 uses for a dead Rat, by Clyde.

[Stonebar]

*A scroll posted in the Blade and Stars seems to suggest that Clyde (rat quest) is branching out and now selling the dead rats as well. Though few, if any, would believe this list was really written by Clyde. There is also more room at the bottom of this scroll left blank with a notation reading "other suggestions welcomed"*

Clyde's 101 uses for a dead rat.
1. Conversation Piece
2. Back Scratcher
3. Lawn Rats (like those pink lawn flamingos) Just add spikes and paint!
4. Bottle Opener
5. Door Stop
6. As a Warning to Live Rats
7. Cheap holiday present to show just how much you love (Loath) someone.
8. Toilet Brush
9. Cheep neck tie.
10. Just Bronze for a forward Ornament for a noble's wagon.
11. A Doll's Toy Horse - 'Charlie'
12. Kids of over protective parents can race them. This way no kids get their feelings hurt as no one ever loses (or wins, given that dead Rats don't move).
13. Quiet Animal Companion
14. Book Mark
15. Table lamp or candle holder
16. Ash Tray
17. Boot Buffer
18. Target Practice
19. Teeth make great Ink quill Sharpeners
20. Hole Puncher
21. Appetizer for a Rottweiller Puppy
22. 'Skippy' the never-tiring Familiar
23. A pet -Rock- Rat, also doubles as a scroll paper weight.
24. Dust rag chamois
25. Feather Duster
26. Wagon window suction toy.
27. Arrow or bolt cozy.
28. Floating mug holder for your bath or pool.
29. Hollow it out to make a fun Rat shaped Jelly Mold.
30. Add one zipper along belly. Voila. One small handbag.
31. A pin cushion
32. Trap tester (would probably work better with live Rats)
33. Use a pair for oven mitts.
34. A substitute travel pillow.
35. Footstool for a Halfling.
36. A unique desk organizer.
37. Letter opener.
38. Pie crust crimping decorator.
39. Roast rack (paws up).
40. Tyfling horn decorations.
41. Elven ear sharpeners.
42. A test for giant spiders, tie to a stick, swish around in web, and run.
43. Parasite farm (similar to an ant farm)
44. Poke holes in one and twirl around your head by the tail for a noise maker (might work better with live Rats)
45. Fertilizer
46. Get two, attach them by a rope; viola! The hottest thing for designer bolos since fuzzy dice.
47. Hang it from the ceiling; becomes a punching bag
48. Bird feeder. Bonus perk of free bird food (see #43)
49. Tetherball!
50. Roasted on an open fire like marsh-mellows, but gamier.
51. Tie seven or eight of them together, attach to a stick, and you have one hell of a Flail!
52. A shaving brush
53. Leave one out in the sun for a week or so, water liberally...a do it yourself Chia pet!
54. Turn them around, blow to inflate, and you have water wings.
55. Bed slippers
56. Deodorant for Orc. The Orc females love it, no need to club one over the head again!
57. Worn around the neck as Aasamar bane. Disclaimer adds no refunds to the fine print
58. Tied to your shoulder like a parrot as a conversation starter, and finger puppet.
59. A fury body suit for Clyde to roll around in (Don’t ask, no really, you don't want to know)
60. Collect a few for a fun chess set.
61. Improvised Lock pick.
62. Crampons
63. Saw in half, bookends
64. Stiffen one to make a tool to pick up other dead Rats with. Never bend over again!
65. Lovely evening wrap for a goblin festive ball.
66. Dangly pierced earrings.
67. A mobile for a Necromancer's baby crib.
68. Weathervane.
69. Used as a Garrote to choke people. Then leave it as a unique assassin's calling card.
70. Another common use for a dead Rat is a cute stencil for a child's room. Alternate Rat stencil with a Sword coast Galleon for a true nautical theme.
71. Hide armor for the growing pixie barbarian guild.
72. Tails make convenient toothpicks for outdoorsy types.
73. A great cat toy.
74. A one-way Boomerang.
75. Makes an unpleasant surprised in the center of a snowball. Note; Flaming Fist will kill you.
76. Rub under nose to awake someone from a drunken stooper.
77. An Ink quill holder (see #19)
78. A very small rug (In place of a Bear)
79. Press between the pages of a book. Makes a lovely memento of your low level adventures.
80. Fill with candy and make a really cool piñata.
81. They make terrific party hats
82. Wand cozy.
83. Toupee'
84. Use it to practice your goal kicks. (Once again, probably works better with live Rats).
85. Hackey Sack.
86. Draft excluder, place them under any door or window and save on your heating bills!
87. Toy for sadistic children.
88. Cheep Kindling.
89. Starter kit for a "Junior Headhunters Set."
90. Boxing glove
91. Can't afford a bear or wolf hide armor? Rats + dye make for a good imitation suit.
92. Paws make good coat hangers
93. Great cheep party Mask.
94. Something to throw at the Bard when they sing off key.
95. Chalkboard eraser
96. Disposable dish rags
97. Tails make a decent fishing lure, use bodies to grow maggots for more bait (see#43).
98. Secret ingredient in Lizardfolk egg soup. Finding a tail in your soup is a sign of good luck....also a sign of food poisoning.
99. A Soubar kids meal toy. Concealed knife within not included unless by special order.
100. Toilet Paper, depends on how desperate you are after that Lizard egg soup.
101. Ever wonder what Amnian Spam is really made of?

[Nomster]

Reading the list, Telia Navra laughs at the absurd suggestions. She had heard of a few before but no list as detailed as this. "Wand cosy eh.."


// Great list! Love how it fits the setting.