About gossiping and (miss)communication

[Miyuki]

Hey guys,

i though about writing this a few and i decided to do it to offer some clarity. I'm not yelling or annoyed and i'm easy at the moment. Maybe just a bit sad. I won't tell names here, because i don't want to accuse anyone. I also don't want anyone to justify themselves. I don't wish a discussion or fight or flame war here. Just please, if you feel, i am speaking to you just take my plea to seriously.

I get adressed, for complaining about other players. But i stoped doing that now, i want to talk to them myself. I want us to work together and get along better.
I get adressed, because my character allegedly makes "her thing" of things that are not hers alone. But in fact she always saw them as mutual events.
I hear that players tell other players about that, about sending screenies and whatever. I thought, that we get along better now and i was glad about it. But still some players get adressed about me and then i get adressed because of this. I will call it bluntly gossiping behind my back.

I stoped doing certain things now. So i ask you guys, please stop that, too. I was really glad that we were better but if i hear such again and again, that foments us players against eachother.
I get adressed, because my character does this and that, but never meat to do it in that way. Thanks to one player who is open to me, i can be open, too. We have talked about it and i hope we are good.
It really hurts, if you honestly want to make things better but others don't let you. Everyone makes mistakes. I apologize for that. But noone deserves that they loose their fun and motivation to play. I acutally love the server and the lore. I love to learn things i didn't know. I don't want to leave this server as i am happy and i have in mind so many things or ideas i would like to do with other players.

I admit, i might cause missunderstandings because of my language. I'm really sorry if that happens and i'm still getting use to RP in english. But please remember, i am a not native english speaking player. Try to be patient with me.
I also experienced that things are interpreted into my character's words or emotes, i never meant to say or do. Missunderstandings can happen. But please, don't talk about me. Talk to me if you don't understand or find something odd. Ask me or my character, we don't bite.

Please think about it and take this to your heart.

Thanks for your understanding.

[Face]

I type like a 12 year old from Kazachstan and im sure some people cant stand it and some folks forgive me for it.
And cant say that i care one way or another and i wil keep having fun in game

Keep that EnGrish stonk!

[Marathados]

Best of luck!

Never experienced anything like that, but can certainly understand it

[Kiran]

Best of luck!

Never experienced anything like that, but can certainly understand it

Thats cos we speak about you behind your back, duh!

People these days...

[flyingchair]

That sucks my friend, i hope it gets better.

Sadly there will always be people that talk behind others back, thats just humans.

But it also sounds like you're making improvements to your own rp, not saying this has to do with the behind your back talking, but you're fighting it by taking a reflective look at yourself, thats good.

Let me know if you ever want to talk about it, ready to listen and help if i can.

[Maecius]

My advice is to ignore it. Focus on having fun -- and making fun for others. I'm glad you love the server and are having fun here. Definitely try to remember that it's a game.

There are some absolutely crazy rumors about me out there (and I won't tell you which ones are true ). But if I took even half of them to heart, I'd have had a nervous breakdown years ago!

In fact, any player who gains any sort of traction or celebrity on any server is going to get people talking about them in character and out of character. It's a sign that your character is popular, if nothing else!

[Kagger911]

My advice is to ignore it. Focus on having fun -- and making fun for others. I'm glad you love the server and are having fun here. Definitely try to remember that it's a game.

There are some absolutely crazy rumors about me out there (and I won't tell you which ones are true ). But if I took even half of them to heart, I'd have had a nervous breakdown years ago!

In fact, any player who gains any sort of traction or celebrity on any server is going to get people talking about them in character and out of character. It's a sign that your character is popular, if nothing else!

This, we can not stress enough of how you need to stop caring about other peoples feelings who get hurt. Just let them build a bridge and get over it. You are your own person and carve your own path, make it fun and make it deep enough for people to notice.

[Miyuki]

I must say, i clearly try to devide, what is game and what not for me. Just to explain how i'm ticking, some examples:

If other toons talk about my toon in game. If another toon catches something my toon said and asks her what's wrong. That is all is game and that is ok. I like when reasonable RP is created.

But if people gossip ooc about me and accuse me ooc for what my character does. If players are beeing fomented agianst eachother That is not a game anymore, that is player's behaviour.

That is what took me down, but it's getting better i think. Thanks for the understanding answers and advice. I hope those who read this, won't blame my toon for ooc stuff and try to keep ooc and RP apart, too.
I will try to worry less and maybe even take it into my RP that my toon is simply sometimes missunderstood. I will try to tell others to cool down and ask before they get upset. I hope we can all care less about what others say. I like the players here and that's what i actually want for us: having fun together.

I am done here.

[Tekill]

Yeah I usually just try to ignore behavior I think is inappropriate.

Also, you could always just attack people too. Follow the rules obviously, but yeah..attack them. It will be fun and exciting.
My guess is that your character has some sort of weapon. Maybe a sword or spell or claw or blast...something. Welp, just go on ahead and use what yah got!
And in the end if you win, have a laugh and enjoy the victory.
And in the end if you lose, also have a laugh, and enjoy the RP of having fallen in battle for your characters convictions (while getting the chance to forget your own convictions for awhile).

Dontcha get it?!
We need to stab people to bring us all together!

[Wolfshear]

I heard Seraphine punched a baby one time. And then kicked a puppy out of spite.

Maybe that baby deserved it, but a puppy? Come on!

[Wolfrayne]

I have heard all kinds of amusing rumors ic and ooc about wolf and tbh i dont care. This is RP, i play my toon as he is. The only time ill show anything ooc is to either fix a bug or maybe something funny that happened.

In all my years here this has always been the case. Dont worry too much what some people say. The good people will make up their own minds and not listen to rumors ic or ooc

[Nyeleni]

I must say, i clearly try to devide, what is game and what not for me. Just to explain how i'm ticking, some examples:

If other toons talk about my toon in game. If another toon catches something my toon said and asks her what's wrong. That is all is game and that is ok. I like when reasonable RP is created.

But if people gossip ooc about me and accuse me ooc for what my character does. If players are beeing fomented agianst eachother That is not a game anymore, that is player's behaviour.

That is what took me down, but it's getting better i think. Thanks for the understanding answers and advice. I hope those who read this, won't blame my toon for ooc stuff and try to keep ooc and RP apart, too.
I will try to worry less and maybe even take it into my RP that my toon is simply sometimes missunderstood. I will try to tell others to cool down and ask before they get upset. I hope we can all care less about what others say. I like the players here and that's what i actually want for us: having fun together.

I am done here.

It only means your character is important enough that others speak about you. Be it good or bad, who cares? You cannot control what is outside of your reach.

As others said once you realize you shouldn't care what other think about you (which is admittedly a hard thing to do), the better you will be off. And you will know more freedom.

[Marathados]

Best of luck!

Never experienced anything like that, but can certainly understand it

Thats cos we speak about you behind your back, duh!

People these days...

Would not expect otherwise

[Rask]

I've been there. It sucks.

The previous advice of "Ignore it and just do what is fun" is really the best advice.

There are a few people who have a love/hate relationship with me, some of them are still around, some are gone. Some people who I thought were good friends I caught talking poorly about me behind my back once upon a time. It happens here, it happens in real life. It sucks, just stick to the nice people and don't bother with the people who make your time here less enjoyable. That's what I do.

Though I applaud you for attempting to make amends, I do the same thing when people get upset with me. Sometimes it works, sometimes people are stubborn. If you try once, at least you tried, but try not to spend too much time trying to get everyone to like you, because not everyone will. Especially in a game like this, sometimes it is just that your play-style and someone else don't match up. It can be that simple. Just make sure you personally are having fun, otherwise it is simply not worth it.

[Tiberis79]

I can honestly say that I can count only three players that have rubbed me wrong enough that play with them is something I do not enjoy and therefore I avoid. One was kicked off the server a few days after joining, because she harassed nearly every character she played with. The other two are still at large and burning bridges, we'll see what happens. I hope they wise up and I am full of second chances.

I RP by a very short list of core rules;

Always play your character.
Always follow the story (and write GOOD stories).
Leave you OOC issues at the door.

Under the tenant "Always play your character" let me say I work hard to provide characters with deep backstories. I haven't been writing a lot of them down because I haven't felt that the work has been worth the effort. I originally invested a lot of time in this but I haven't felt the stories have been consumed or used so I just play for the most part now. I play four main characters; Kessa Gren, Lannia Ranloss (formerly Lannia Tannen), Linela Fryar, and Marie Greaves.

Even with as much work developing a story as I put into these characters they are, at the end of the day CHARACTERS. I don't limit my role play to certain groups or people. Kessa is friends with people Lannia won't talk to. Marie is friends with characters Linela despises. Lots of people play multiple characters, and I enjoy that. I can be mortal enemies with then in one pairing and best buds in another. Get this...

We may or may not -ever- talk OOC, when we do we are friends even when our characters are trying to kill each other. --Because it's a game folks.-- I would like to see a lot more really bad baddies out there and express my appreciation to players who knowingly play the characters everyone loves to hate.

I play with and enjoy Freya. When I don't understand what she meant I ask her, because I am an adult. I play with a few other English-challenged players. It's one of the hardest languages there is, so how about a round of applause to the dedication of our foreign players? Goodness knows with 38 years of speaking it, I still manage to mangle it.